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How can I get over my insecurities before it ruins my relationship?
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<blockquote data-quote="Moomew" data-source="post: 2387151" data-attributes="member: 821773"><p>My Boyfriend and I have been dating for nearly a year now and our relationship has recently been put to the test. After two months we had sex for the first time, It was my first time but unfortunately not his, I however believed it was his first time. Straight after I knew that we had rushed into it and i regretted it straight away. I still to this day wish we had waited longer. A few months later I found out from my friend that the girl my boyfriend had had sex with was a girl I REALLY didn't like. This girls also has a reputation of a slut and so on and so forth. Its been bothering me since I found out about it, in fact its been bothering me so much i don't even want to have sex with him. I've of course told him about this and hes upset- Not because hes not having sex but because he says the sex means a lot to him, he feels it was our way of showing love in a more Intimate way. However, Due to how im feeling at the moment Sex does not feel special to me and I feel like a slut whenever we do have sex. </p><p></p><p>Im very old fashioned in how I wanted to have sex with the man I want to spend the rest of my live with and my boyfriend is the complete opposite. I found out he used to go out and get drunk, do weed and make out with random people. This may sounds awful but I feel of him as a man whore now and that im nothing more then just another girl for him to play around with. I hate knowing what hes done and I tell him I wish he never told me, but of course. He says he wouldn't like a relationship based on a lie.</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately the problem has just escalated ten fold. I recently found out im pregnant and i am only sixteen years old. This is very hard for me to accept and whilst my boyfriend is happy about it, Im not. I feel disgusted that I have done this to myself and I want nothing more then to abort. I also cant get the 'His Ex could have had this baby' Out of the back of my head. I feel like an awful mum and its killing me that I hate my own baby. I also hate myself for what im doing to my boyfriend but that me sex doesn't feel special, it doesnt feel like were doing it because we love each other and i can't enjoy it when the only thing I can thing about is how im nothing more then some other girl.</p><p></p><p>I HATE this feeling and itsRuiningng my relationship with my boyfriend. We're constantly arguing, I hate my own baby and I barely want to see my boyfriend. Its awful. I need to get over his ex and I need to do it fast before she destroys his relationship. I have honest to god tried to ignore it and so on but its simply not working. I really need some help.</p><p></p><p>I LOVE this boy. And I do, Its why im trying to get help. Im not sugar coating anything, i know Im being rather silly about this and holding onto old grudges -But my previous relationship was with an abusive partner, which makes it ahrd for me to trust men. I do Love my boyfriend which is why i need help so our relationship can be healthy and strong again.</p><p>This is NOT about my ego; The only reason I dont like this girl is because when i started dating my boyfriend she called me an inexperienced dog and told me that I would never be as good as her. I tried to be civil with her but she refused to accept my friendship. This all happened before I knew it was her that he had had sex with. This is NOTHING to do with my ego. Go take your snobby answers else where and start trying to help people.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Moomew, post: 2387151, member: 821773"] My Boyfriend and I have been dating for nearly a year now and our relationship has recently been put to the test. After two months we had sex for the first time, It was my first time but unfortunately not his, I however believed it was his first time. Straight after I knew that we had rushed into it and i regretted it straight away. I still to this day wish we had waited longer. A few months later I found out from my friend that the girl my boyfriend had had sex with was a girl I REALLY didn't like. This girls also has a reputation of a slut and so on and so forth. Its been bothering me since I found out about it, in fact its been bothering me so much i don't even want to have sex with him. I've of course told him about this and hes upset- Not because hes not having sex but because he says the sex means a lot to him, he feels it was our way of showing love in a more Intimate way. However, Due to how im feeling at the moment Sex does not feel special to me and I feel like a slut whenever we do have sex. Im very old fashioned in how I wanted to have sex with the man I want to spend the rest of my live with and my boyfriend is the complete opposite. I found out he used to go out and get drunk, do weed and make out with random people. This may sounds awful but I feel of him as a man whore now and that im nothing more then just another girl for him to play around with. I hate knowing what hes done and I tell him I wish he never told me, but of course. He says he wouldn't like a relationship based on a lie. Unfortunately the problem has just escalated ten fold. I recently found out im pregnant and i am only sixteen years old. This is very hard for me to accept and whilst my boyfriend is happy about it, Im not. I feel disgusted that I have done this to myself and I want nothing more then to abort. I also cant get the 'His Ex could have had this baby' Out of the back of my head. I feel like an awful mum and its killing me that I hate my own baby. I also hate myself for what im doing to my boyfriend but that me sex doesn't feel special, it doesnt feel like were doing it because we love each other and i can't enjoy it when the only thing I can thing about is how im nothing more then some other girl. I HATE this feeling and itsRuiningng my relationship with my boyfriend. We're constantly arguing, I hate my own baby and I barely want to see my boyfriend. Its awful. I need to get over his ex and I need to do it fast before she destroys his relationship. I have honest to god tried to ignore it and so on but its simply not working. I really need some help. I LOVE this boy. And I do, Its why im trying to get help. Im not sugar coating anything, i know Im being rather silly about this and holding onto old grudges -But my previous relationship was with an abusive partner, which makes it ahrd for me to trust men. I do Love my boyfriend which is why i need help so our relationship can be healthy and strong again. This is NOT about my ego; The only reason I dont like this girl is because when i started dating my boyfriend she called me an inexperienced dog and told me that I would never be as good as her. I tried to be civil with her but she refused to accept my friendship. This all happened before I knew it was her that he had had sex with. This is NOTHING to do with my ego. Go take your snobby answers else where and start trying to help people. [/QUOTE]
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