So I've been dating my boyfriend for about three months and he is, by far, the greatest man I've ever been with... sweet, kind, affectionate, attractive, intelligent, and we have so much in common. About two weeks ago I started to notice that he has been somewhat distant with me. I don't call him often (never did to begin with, as it’s usually easier for me to text), but I've noticed that when I do call he doesn't answer and usually returns my call later in the day. Same with texting. Toward the beginning of our relationship he texted me more often than I him, now I'm lucky if I get a response that's not five hours too late. It seems like a things have gone downhill… he’s not as affectionate, and doesn’t really show much of an interest in my life. He used to ask me all kinds of questions, and now it seems that although he mostly talks about himself. We are together somewhat often, although it sometimes seems as though he’d rather be somewhere else.
He has a lot of big plans in life, which is one of the reasons I’m attracted to him. I very much like that he’s ambitious and adventurous. He just graduated from college last year, and has been recently applying to med schools. Fortunately, he has gotten an interview from a nearby University, but is incredibly stressed and nervous out about this (which is obviously understandable). I believe that he is very worthy of being accepted and have tried to express this to him, however it seems like no matter what I say, it sort of just flies in one ear and out the other. Like he’s asking me a rhetorical question and not even intending on a response. I don’t know if I should take this as indifference or that he’s just not getting the response he wants. Either way, I know he has a lot on his plate right now and have been waiting patiently and trying to be as helpful and supportive as possible, but I feel like anything I try to do or say is just bothersome to him, even though sometimes he inadvertently asks for my input.
I don’t believe that there is someone else in the picture, mostly because I know he’s mature enough to act like an adult and simply talk to me about it. I’m secure enough with myself to give him some space and let him deal with any of his problems himself. I don’t nag him about not calling me, or returning my texts, or not spending enough time with me. In fact, I haven’t said anything to him about how I’m feeling, although it’s killing me right now. I believe that if he is preoccupied with this interview, he already has enough to think about. The problem is that it’s been two weeks now and I’ve had about enough of this distance as I can take. I also fear that if he doesn’t get accepted, all of this will do nothing but get worse. I want to be there for him, but I don’t know what to do anymore.
Is there something I can do? I want my boyfriend back.
He has a lot of big plans in life, which is one of the reasons I’m attracted to him. I very much like that he’s ambitious and adventurous. He just graduated from college last year, and has been recently applying to med schools. Fortunately, he has gotten an interview from a nearby University, but is incredibly stressed and nervous out about this (which is obviously understandable). I believe that he is very worthy of being accepted and have tried to express this to him, however it seems like no matter what I say, it sort of just flies in one ear and out the other. Like he’s asking me a rhetorical question and not even intending on a response. I don’t know if I should take this as indifference or that he’s just not getting the response he wants. Either way, I know he has a lot on his plate right now and have been waiting patiently and trying to be as helpful and supportive as possible, but I feel like anything I try to do or say is just bothersome to him, even though sometimes he inadvertently asks for my input.
I don’t believe that there is someone else in the picture, mostly because I know he’s mature enough to act like an adult and simply talk to me about it. I’m secure enough with myself to give him some space and let him deal with any of his problems himself. I don’t nag him about not calling me, or returning my texts, or not spending enough time with me. In fact, I haven’t said anything to him about how I’m feeling, although it’s killing me right now. I believe that if he is preoccupied with this interview, he already has enough to think about. The problem is that it’s been two weeks now and I’ve had about enough of this distance as I can take. I also fear that if he doesn’t get accepted, all of this will do nothing but get worse. I want to be there for him, but I don’t know what to do anymore.
Is there something I can do? I want my boyfriend back.