My fiance doesn't like me smoking pot but I do it anyway?

MandyMills

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My fiance and I have been together for over a year, and we trust each other with everything, and I tell him absolutely everything- with the exception of one thing. That I occasionally smoke pot with his brother's girlfriend, (whose also my good friend), only once in a while.

When my fiance and I started dating, I was doing a lot of recreational drugs and kinda abusing them- nothing too terrible, but he didn't like that scene, and helped me out of it, which I am forever grateful for. I completely and utterly understand why he doesn't want me smoking pot, but pot wasn't the problem back then- it was worse that that. I've done a lot of drugs to the point that I hardly consider pot a drug.

He doesn't drink, smoke, and has only smoked pot a few times, and for that, I respect him to no end. He allows me to drink occasionally and socially, and I smoke cigarettes which is fine with him (he is helping me quit though, much to his enjoyment) but he won't allow me to occasionally smoke weed.

I have done it a few times with his brothers girlfriend (we all live together right now) and i've told him after, because I cannot hide anything from him, and he's blown it waaay out of proportion. He can't tell i'm high unless I tell him- whereas when I drink, my low tolerance becomes apparent, and I always get pretty hammered.

I've been smoking very occasionally and socially only with his brother's girlfriend, who is also my close friend- and I haven't been telling him. I've promised not to, and I know if he knew, he'd be so mad, but I really enjoy doing it socially. All it does is calm me down and ease my stress. I don't act like an idiot, and he never, ever notices. I know that pot doesn't mess me up nearly as much as drinking does, I think if he knew more about weed, he wouldn't mind - but he's very closed minded and stubborn, and wouldn't understand.

Should I tell him? Should I stop? Am I at fault for this?
I love my fiance more than life itself - I never hide anything from him, and every time I do it, I feel guilty. He's an amazing man, and I'd never want to hurt him. I know he wouldn't leave me if he knew, he'd just be mad and disapointed.

Opinions please!!
Also - Will this deeply hurt our relationship? Am I a bad person for doing this? I truly do love him, and if he asked me if I was high, I'd tell him yes because I don't lie to him. I only just don't tell him, because he never notices or asks.
 
you should stop.

he wants you to stop because he cares about you. if you dont stop not only will you hurt him, remember you are hurting yourself as well.
 
I think he needs to know the truth so he can make an informed decision! As it is, you are lying by omission. My daughter married a guy who smoked pot "on occasion" and divorced him 2 years ago because he was a full blown cocaine addict and was running them into bankruptcy with his addiction.
You say you love him more than live but you don't know if you're willing to give up smoking dope for him???? That statement speaks heaps my friend!......especially if it's only occasional use! One thing I learned by watching my son in law destroy his marriage is that people with drug addictions are liars!.......and they make promises they've no intention of keeping. If you respect your fiance even a little bit, he needs to know what he's dealing with!
 
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