I suffered from Shyness / Social Anxiety when I was younger but still suffer from a terrible self esteem - I mix my words, don't know what to say, can't hold conversation - I have a real inability to stay in the moment and not let my negative thoughts overcome me - so much that I think that whatever I say is worthless. I find it difficult to make new friends and the ones I do make friends with are ones that are very persistant at getting to know me and usually when in a one on one situation.
I have suffered periods of depression - usually when faced with changing jobs and therefore having to meet new people and also when I have to face greater and greater responsbilities in my job - stress also triggers my depression - it stems from the beleif that I can not do something - I put up these huge barriers.
I qualified as a accountant a few years ago - I like the structure and direction it gave me in life but after I finished my exams I realised that I'd set myself up for a really demanding, stressful career and all in all I found accounting well paid but ultimately uninteresting. I lost a house and good partner over this and depression. After this period I went travelling for a year and had the best year of my life in a long time - met a few good people but to my own fault lost contact with them (I think there is something inside me which says that eventually they'll be bored with me). I returned home and came depressed again - what with no friends, no partner, same career which I do not want to pursue again etc.
I'm seriously thinking of changing career to at least give me a new zest for life - I cant carry on wasting my life on something that doesnt interest / depress me. I gained a lot of confidence in travelling and would happily fly anywhere in the world alone and sometimes I think simply of doing this and seeing where it takes me but Ive got my retirement plans to think of surely?
I am also seeing professionals to overcome my depression which has helped a lot.
Has anyone else been in this position? How did you overcome this career trapping? How did you figure out what career you really wanted? Is there hope? I am so confused? Do I have to simply improve my self esteem - maybe then I would be more interested in my work? I loved travelling becaused of the different cultures, beautiful scenery and the ability to change things / places whenever I wanted to - lots of freedom and choice.
I have suffered periods of depression - usually when faced with changing jobs and therefore having to meet new people and also when I have to face greater and greater responsbilities in my job - stress also triggers my depression - it stems from the beleif that I can not do something - I put up these huge barriers.
I qualified as a accountant a few years ago - I like the structure and direction it gave me in life but after I finished my exams I realised that I'd set myself up for a really demanding, stressful career and all in all I found accounting well paid but ultimately uninteresting. I lost a house and good partner over this and depression. After this period I went travelling for a year and had the best year of my life in a long time - met a few good people but to my own fault lost contact with them (I think there is something inside me which says that eventually they'll be bored with me). I returned home and came depressed again - what with no friends, no partner, same career which I do not want to pursue again etc.
I'm seriously thinking of changing career to at least give me a new zest for life - I cant carry on wasting my life on something that doesnt interest / depress me. I gained a lot of confidence in travelling and would happily fly anywhere in the world alone and sometimes I think simply of doing this and seeing where it takes me but Ive got my retirement plans to think of surely?
I am also seeing professionals to overcome my depression which has helped a lot.
Has anyone else been in this position? How did you overcome this career trapping? How did you figure out what career you really wanted? Is there hope? I am so confused? Do I have to simply improve my self esteem - maybe then I would be more interested in my work? I loved travelling becaused of the different cultures, beautiful scenery and the ability to change things / places whenever I wanted to - lots of freedom and choice.