What do you think?! *EDIT AND REPOST*?

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Claire~LappyLoverm~

New member
Tori Wenton just celebrated her 15th birthday. It was just like every other birthday- her parents crying the whole day, ignoring Tori and leaving her to enjoy her birthday alone. When Tori coughs up enough courage to ask why they were so upset, she finds out the worst- she was a triplet, and her brother and sister were killed in a car accident at two months while she was still very sick in the hospital. In result, she begins to self destruct- cutting, drinking, smoking, drugs... But on a visit to the cemetary to meet the brother and sister she never knew she had, Tori meets Logan, a depressed, quiet young man who comes to the cemetary daily to see his mom and little brother that died in a car crash, too. Tori and Logan become fast friends and help each other get back on their feet, and almost fall in love- until they find out that their family died in the same crash. Will the devastating news ruin their friendship forever? Or will they over come it?
It's a story plot. LOL. I forgot to add that in there. :)

Any suggestions? Would you read something like it?!
 
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LavonteR

New member
i like it i wanna read it but i think you should explain the girl a little more but im sure in the story you will since this is just the plot but this was great i like your writing style and its sounds pro
 
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YoursTruly

New member
Sorry but it just seems... over-dramatic. And it seems like she would have figured out that she was triplet before now from pictures and stuff. Did the parents really not take pictures of them before they were two months old? That's a really hard secret to keep for 15 years.
Maybe if you changed so she figured out the reason of their death, rather than their entire existence. And maybe a twin rather than a triplet, so not so many people die. Also, it seems a bit dramatic to have Logan come every day. Maybe like once a week instead. I think it definitely has the potential to be a good story
 
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