Would you be interested in a book that had this Epilogue?!?

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VampiresTrueLove

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Epilogue: I felt as if all the walls I had built up had all crashed down at the exact moment that I saw him, I knew that if I let my mind wander my heart might break. But even in the few seconds that had just passed my mind had already begin to imagine it, everything, as if he were the one I loved like he could actually ever fill that place that I held for him. That one perfect moment that every girl dreams of, when the preacher finally declares ‘’you may kiss the bride.’’ I knew it would never happen, not any more. Even if I did meet someone that I liked I would never let it go too far because I could never risk getting hurt again.

-Please give me input i want to know what people think! :)
 
WOW YOUR AN ARTIST, THAT IS AMAZING! I would definately use that- (i won't though). That is wicked good. But i wouldn't use that as an epilougue. Use it as more of an introductory. Good Job
 
Absolutely not.

Reasons include:-

* The text introduces information about the start of a story. An epilogue refers to the time AFTER the story. Thus, in more ways than one you don't know what an epilogue is and don't know what it is you wrote. If that's the standard of your knowledge of story-writing then it's a very poor show.

* The text describes a very unsophisticated - almost childish - scene of sickly-sweet romance, including cliches such as "That one perfect moment that every girl dreams of".

* The standard of English isn't good. For example:
The tautology within "all the walls I had built up had all crashed down";
The mixed tense in "my mind had already begin to imagine it".

* Poor semantics: "I knew it would never happen, not any more."

* Complete lack of drama, tension, and plot.
 
First off, I would read whatever book that would be in.

I think that it sounds more like a prologue or an epilogue of the first book in a series, as it transitioned from one book to another. But it might sound different in context.
 
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