Can my son's mother take him out of state for vacation without permission and/or

SteveC

Member
notification? In the middle of a custody battle with ex girlfriend. We both are under a geographical restriction to our city and the bordering counties. I recently discovered that she is planning to take our son for Thanksgiving out of state to visit her family. She has yet to tell me or the court about this, and she presently doesn't know that I am aware of this. Can she do this? Does she need my permission or at least the court's permission? Or does she just have to notify both me and the court in writing with a promise she will return with the child. We live in Texas.
Drixnot: Do us all a favor and spare us the "I am woman hear me roar" crap! You're reading something that isn't there.
 
A very awkward situation. If you let her violate the custody agreement, you win nothing. If you try to prosecute her, you also win nothing. Been there, done that. My ex violated the "within state" thing, too. My attorney cautioned me to avoid prosecution, but to try to get something in return. Maybe you could get an extra weekend, or maybe get her to agree to you taking your son somewhere for a special vacation.

I tell ya, divorce and custody do nothing to make people behave more reasonably. Everyone feels they got "screwed" somehow, so they're inclined to "get even" by doing something with the handiest football, the child. I think your ex is a lousy person. But don't sink to her level. Try talking to her, work something out between the two of you.

The only thing I can suggest is that you not identify the source of your information, especially if it's the child.

Technically, she *does* need the court's permission. In the real world, the court will hesitate to do anything punitive because that "offense" may not rise to the level of incarceration. I mention this because I'm not aware of any other punitive action that a court could take, if the court decided that this violation merited court punishment. But trying to punish her will bite you in the family court butt. Try working things out with her.

If she remains an unmovable witch, document what you can, then consult your attorney for possible action. You can always take your documented information to the court when you apply for a custody modification. No way to guess which way the court will decide. Courts tend to favor the mother a lot. Yeah, that's not fair, but it's a fact you gotta live with for another decade or so. Best of luck!!
 

Judith

Member
I agree with David - be a better man. Let her know that you know but, more importantly, you have no problem with her doing this as long as the court also knows. Let the child have a good Thanksgiving. He can do Christmas with you. You and she should be bending over backwards to do what is best for the child and that means cooperating and thinking of the child and not yourselves and your desire to "get even."
 

DavidsFile

New member
NO she has to get your permission, that kid belongs to both of you whether she likes it or not... unless your a dead beat parent then you lose your privileges ... She need to let the courts know whats going on , just dont ruin the kids holiday just because you want to get even or be spiteful. Its not your kids fault you guys cant make it work... send her an email stating that you know whats happeneing and that you would like to be notified if he is taken out of state /area. do it nicely and get her to agree that way if she dips out on you with your kid you have some sort of proof that she agreed and then broke her agreement...
 
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