1. Was born (to a set of very short parents).
2. In no way had a homosexual encounter.
3. Starred in Cocktail.
4. Definitely didn't have any gay relationships.
5. Married Nicole Kidman.
6. Divorced Nicole Kidman (but not because he was gay, which he definitely isn't).
7. Married that tall girl from Dawson's Creek.
8. Does NOT keep a stock of malnourished rentboys in his basement.