Depressed mother..doesn't want a visit?

[lorien_gal27]

I have a mother who has been going through a depression for well over two years now. She lives in the USA (with my dad) and I live here in the UK. We (my husband, daughter and myself) last visited them in the summer of 2007. It was a strained atmosphere partly due to the fact that she would never leave the house. In the 3 weeks we were there she literally never left the house to do anything. My dad had told me that she was a recluse and he was right. Last summer my dad told us not to visit because things had gotten really bad with her. Seven weeks ago I had a baby boy and had been planning on visiting in June to let them meet their new grandson. My dad seemed excited about the idea. So did my mom..then last week she told me that she didn't want us staying at their house. She has become very neurotic about keeping a clean house and doesn't want kids there (along with the baby I have a 3 1/2 year old). We can't afford a hotel for a three week visit and I have a feeling that it's going to be more of the same..her refusing to leave the house and not wanting us to visit until my dad gets home from work. I don't know what to do. Go ahead with the visit or cancel this year's trip? I feel at this rate my kids will never get to know their American grandparents. My dad refuses to push into seeing a doctor to get some help. I feel sad and helpless.
wind m....I would LOVE for my parents to visit over here. I have suggested it and offered to pay for the flights but she refuses to get on a plane. Thanks for answering!