for anyone who has or will have or wants to have KIDS!!!?

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DADDY'S GONNA EAT YOUR FINGERS ......... This one is for everyone who ...a) has kids, b) had kids, c) was a kid, d) knows a kid e) is going to have kidsI was packing for my business trip and my three year old daughter washaving a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she said,"Daddy, look at this," and stuck out two of her fingersTrying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingersin my mouth and said, "Daddy's gonna eat your fingers," pretending toeat them. I went back to packing, looked up again and my daughter wasstanding on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look onher face.I said, "What's wrong, honey?"She replied, "What happened to my booger?"
 
LOL! This is a very funny joke. Here's a star.Do you like this joke?The pet shop owner watched as a small girl bought the last dog that wasn't a dalmatian. The pet shop owner used to have 30 dogs, but, since nobody bought the dalmatians, he had 10 dogs left, and they were all dalmatians. The pet shop owner waited, and waited, and waited, but nobody bought the dalmatians. Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. By now 3 months had went by, and still, no one had bought a dalmatian. The dalmatians were now getting larger, and, since the pet shop owner didn't have much money, he sent a note to his friend that said, "I'm sell-a-matian". He forgot the ing at th end of sell. When his friend opened the letter, he tore of the I'm on the letter. When he read it, it now said sell-a-mation. His friend raced over to the pet shop and said, where's the celabration?
 
OMG that's a kid for ya when my 14 yr old was 3 he came to me with a funny look on his face and said "Mommy, what is this smell ? smell my finger!" so i did and WOHBUDDY!! i said mike where in the world have you had that finger? he grinned up at me and said"in my butt"
 
hahahahahahha i love this joke. actually its probably a true story. lol great one
 
HERE IS SOME KIDS JOKE FOR UOne day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"****** A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".******A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or loo king up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."******The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's dead."******A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.. ""Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."******The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chipcookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
 
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