Guy rules

My screen saver at work says "Leave The Gun Take The Cannoli"

I've had to explain this to 5-6 different guys, none of which have ever seen/read the Godfather. I cry a single tear just thinking about it.
 
Guy rule number 72: whatever might feasibly go into a man's mouth, shall be smelled first. NO exceptions.
 
Rule 73: Many men may pee in the same hedge, but don't cross the streams dude!

Mitch
 
Guy rule#75. You accept the fact that Slipthejab obeys all the above rules.
 
Rule #76: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both. That’s just plain mean
 
Rule #77: A man always puts up shelves straight. If the shelf doesn't look straight it is because the earth is slanted, not the shelf.
 
Rule 78: Real men set fire to things. Real men don't care about the environment.

Rule 79: If a girl or woman can lift as much as you, you have to act really disparaging to her, and call her politically incorrect names. You can even accuse her of having hyperandrogenism. Even if she's 112lbs and has obviously smooth skin.

Rule 80: Igniting your farts is cool. You should do this at least once and preferably film and share it on youtube.
 
Guy rule #84: any item of your clothing over 15 years old is not worn out....it is merely worn in
 
Guy rule #85: An old gym sock filled with jelly is a valid substitute for a good woman.
 
lololololol....It's good I finished my tea before I read your post.

I hope what you said is not even close to what I think you said.
 
I'd just like to state this is VZ's opinion and is no way indicative of anyone I know (hopefully). In fact I can't think of any dessert that would, could, or ever has been a viable substitute for a ....person

Just thought it needed saying. Carry on
 
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