Here's a look at the old day's of Pagan Communications (92) on the...

Terry

Member
...internet. What do you think we were like? Newsgroups: alt.religion.wicca
Subject: As <subliminal> ARW Turns <twisted>

Things have really changed <not!> around the ol' balefire <garbage
incinerator> here at ARW <Anal Retentive Weirdoes>. The banishment <warlock,
slut, looozer> of the worst trolls <dearly missed regulars> seemed to make
things so much better <get a bucket, I think I'm gonna puke> for everyone
<has a mouse in their pocket>. Its just so calm <before the storm> and
peaceful <dead pan> here since we rid ourselves of those losers <people that
didn't agree with us>. The troll slayers <good trolls> have been working
overtime for our benefit <they love us>, and we sincerely <smarminess> thank
them for their selfless acts of loving kindness <brutal attacks>. A well
deserved <shot in the head> round of ARW <Arrogant Raving Whiners> applause
is in order I think <shoot me...>. Or maybe some medals <or chests> would be
more fitting <nooses>...
The On Topic <alt.religion.bicker> posts have really come to the surface
lately <shit floats>. We've seen some really powerful information <I'm a
Witch dammit, fear me!> flowing like honey <weak brown effluvia> from many
sources <lots of assholes>. We've heard about how Wicca is doing in the
Klingon Empire <trek nerd>, I'm sure Gowron is proud <he lives on another
planet>. We got a serious lesson or two in astrology <Demonic Scorpions>,
warding <hex me I dare you!>, and alternative styles of Dream Catchers <what
the fuck is Goetic...a sore on your foot?>. It seems we now have a weekly
Herb Article <Jackie's Pot Emporium>, and a history lesson on the origins of
the Pentagram <Satan, Satan...dammit Stan>. The very interesting subject of
Trepanation <like a hole in the head> was also discussed at length <three
lines>. Hyapatia of Alexandria was mentioned <OldOne's younger sister>, and
so was Lewis Carol <Ren's favorite Wiccan>. We were all invited to NYC to
see Nosferatu <I'm broke>, and reminded of the really good stuff on HBO
<Home Bestiality Organization>. We got a lesson on Pagan youth activities
<can I come to the skyclad area mom, pleeeeze> from the perspective of a
young pagan <too old to sacrifice>. Several independent discussions on
marriage <cheating>, handfasting <cheating>, and marital relationships
<cheating> were seen. We also had a few useful polls <yawn>, that really
helped set the stage for <severe case of the dumbass> lasting peace here
<when hel freezes over>. Poetic license <007> seems also on the rise <gag me with a spork>.
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It's just two paragraphs because we were rather long winded.
 
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