How do I make my 34 mo old son stop crying and whining to get what he wants?

[1stTimeMom1]

Almost every morning he whines and cries loudly about waking up his Dad or playing with a noisy toy. I try to explain that in the morning we have to keep our voices soft and let others sleep and that he should play quietly. I try to redirect him to other activities but he insists and uses crying to get his way.

 

[gypsy_melon]

what's that old saying? "a pat on the back works wonders when applied young enough, often enough, and low enough"

seriously, i understand if you don't believe in spanking, but there should be some form of discipline, and 34 months is past old enough to understand directions and consequences. try a time out corner, if you don't believe in physical discipline, and if you do believe in it, lightly bop his mouth and say "no tantrums" in a firm voice when he wails--one time. if he continues, pick him up, set him in his room, and close the door until he calms down. explain on your way there that he disobeyed, and now he needs to stay here until he can control his temper, and then say nothing else until the matter is closed. then, hug him, talk to him, etc.

 

[pidegab]

Been there... the best way I had to solve this issue with my son, was to ignore his crying and whining.. That way he knew he wouldn't get it all his way. The more I used to give in to his crying, the more he would do it, so I had to do the opposite. At this age, it's very complicated because they don't really listen or understand when we try to explain so hang in there, because it shall pass as he gets a bit older. Good luck!

 

[dancing_in_sunlight]

I would say that you will have to take an active role in re-directing him, which I am sure you are trying at the moment. One thing you can do to enhance what you are already doing is to consider what types of activities he really enjoys that are quiet. Find a high shelf/locking cabinet for the noisy playthings and make sure to put them up at night. Instead of trying to fight with him to keep him quiet, get him on your side. Make him excited about being quiet so Daddy can sleep. Sit with him and read some books, make some edible playdough the day before and pull that out for him to enjoy. Set aside a space farther away from Daddy's room where your child's "special" morning activities are stored and where he can play with them. Keep him occupied so that he doesn't think about disturbing those who are sleeping. It's hard and it might take some time to develop a routine, but it will be much more rewarding than having to continue to try and remind him that Daddy needs his sleep. At almost three, he really won't be able to get that concept even if you tried punishment, time out, etc. Re-direction is much more fun and will make the morning flow much better.

 

[TomS]

You are doing the right thing...keep it up! He WILL grow out of it if you DON'T reward him with what ever he is crying about (or for). It is hard, but continue to explain how he should act...just once per episode...and then ignore him. Too bad dad wants to sleep but its is just part of the program!

He will continue acting out if you give in to his tantrums. Be strong and gentle, he will catch on. Give it time and most importantly, be consistent.

Also, using common sense; say "yes" as much as possible when he acts correctly.

Good Luck!

 

[NearlyHeadlessNick]

Don't give him what he wants when he's whining or crying. He has conditioned you to respond to his whining, now you need to let him know that you are in charge and he's getting nothing from you when he whines or cries.