how do i politely ask her?

[rogers83]

our nephew that we have temp. gaudionship of for 4 months is getting real close to us. his mother is on drugs, has no job, and lives at home with her mother. she lives about 20 foot away and only comes and sees him about 10 min a week if that. we provide everything for him. we have 2 other children that are very close to him also. i am a nursing student, my husband head of a casino buffet, we are very stable and own our own home and can give him what he needs. he is on meds for asthma which we found out he had not her. one day she says when she gets a place she is going to take her with him which that is fine she is his mother but like i said she is one drugs and we've had him for 4 months now so she could get on her feet and now she is just getting worse not better. he screams when she trys to take him nextdoor with her so she just puts him down and walks out. my question is what do i do and if i should ask her to sign over full custody how should i ask her something like that because
as a parent myself i would ask someone if they were crazy if they asked me something like that. although she does know he will be taking care of to the fullest and can see him anytime she wants. please help i don't want to cause a family feud. also she is my sister-in- law and my family and my husbands family is on our side with this and believes we should do something about this

 

[Animal Lover]

You tell her how you feel about your nephew. How you love him and your kids love him too. Point out the stability in your home vs her lack of a home. Let her know if she really loves him at all she should do what is in his best interest out of that love. I think the one to talk to her should be you if she is your sister or your husband if it is his sister. That seems like it would be taken better from that person to her. Also, you might want to talk to an attorney and ask how to go about getting permanent custody of him. I would document all the things that take place, like the times she does not show up or leaves him because he does not want to go. Everything in writing! Your nephew is lucky to have you and your family to care for him. He is blessed to have others love him. Good luck to you!

 

[chavezgardens]

Consult an attorney first

 

[Kevin]

maybe call cps
see if there is a way where the mother can be taken into a rehab and where you can adopt him

 

[hushnowjustplayit]

I totally understand your point, but that's a hard choice to make about what is in the best interest of the child. What would happen if she gives you full custody and then somewhere down the line cleans up her act?

Or what if her child is the only incentive she has for trying to clean up her act? What if by taking her child you are sentencing her to life of regrets leading her to further bury herself in drugs?