I NEED TO VENT. DAMN SCHOOL. Depression.?

[Missconfused]

Okay so I'm in the 11th grade and I'm in a desperate need to vent. I don't want to talk to my friends because I feel like I would annoy them. But anyways. This school year I decided to take 4 AP classes. I'm taking AP Spanish, AP Bio, AP US History, Trig, Photography, and AP English Lang. These classes made me think... I'm not good at ANYTHING. I had all B's last year and now this. Although I have a 3.3 GPA this year but that's only from the boost of the AP's but yeah I'm Hispanic and I SUCK at writing in Spanish, my spelling isn't great either. I would like to become a veterinarian and I SUCK AT BIO. I of course don't know what I'm going to be doing in the future anymore. I HATE HISTORY, enough said. I suck at math as well...My photography class blows, and I suck at writing. This makes me depressed. I SUCK AT EVERYTHING. I can study all night and I will still fail a test. I get so mad that I study for a class more than I sleep and I have friends that barley study AND THEY END UP GETTING A BETTER GRADE THEN I DO. I can't take this shit anymore. What's going to happen to my future? I'm going to be broke man. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up anymore. I have a low ass self esteem. I honestly think of like hurting or killing myself but I'm never too serious of it, i just think about it and it scares me. i just feel like I'm a failure at everything. I feel so depressed and I put on a smile for my friends and UGH. FUCK SCHOOL. What should I do guys? I sometimes picture myself having a huge house my nice children and my husband. BUT IT LOOKS LIKE I'LL NEVER HAVE THAT EITHER. I'm also fat -_- I was also thinking of taking some drugs. Like some drugs that will help my concentrate better. I would also like to do weed, I just want to take a drug that can help me because right now I'm going no where. WHAT SHOULD I DO?