I'm getting very discouraged in karate, I don't know what to do?

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Alexis

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I've been doing karate for a long time now. Next month, I'm supposed to go take my black-stripe 1st kyu test. I have to go test at a seminar and I'm the type of person to get nervous very easily. I've been losing faith in karate, but not just because of this test. I used to be at the point where I would cry if I missed a class, and I was so good at it! Now, I almost come crying from class because of how frustrated I am with it. I practice at home and I get really into it, but at the dojo I just can't focus or anything - I don't know what's wrong. :( I don't want to stop doing karate all together, but it's honestly causing me so much stress. My friends there aren't really my friends anymore, they're one/two higher ranks than me and they talk to me like I'm stupid now. I help the lower ranks, and most of them don't listen and roll their eyes whenever I tell them how to fix something. I don't feel like I'm respected or wanted there and it's causing me so much discouragement. I don't feel like I'm good at it anymore or even that I should be there. But, I know I'll regret it if I quit. I'm so scared that I'm going to do horrible at my test because of how I feel, and that I'll never get back to where I once was. I need some advice? :\
 
I strongly agree with pugpaws2. The dojo is a place of respect, not just fpor the teachers and higher ranks, respect is for everybody. I second the motion to show this post to your instructor. As stated, if he/she is a good instructor a good solution can be found. If he can't find such a solution, find a more competent instructor. I have been teaching karate nearly 40 years, and that is no way to have students feeling about the dojo. The instructor(s) will want this fixed too.
 
hello,

This was a kind of problem even I faced at my beggining stages.. I was good at it right from the beggining .. but for strange reasons my dojo mates never really tried to care for what I was saying .. they would just overlook me as if I was not there. I hurted a lot. I couldnt leave it as I loved it just like you . So I decided that I am going to win my respect there. From the next day actually I went in a reverse gear .. I stopped talking to my dojomates ..I held my whole concentration in the class and within no time I was being recognised as the master of the 12 flying kicks in my class by our coach.. whenever there were any group discussions about kicks or punches between my mates I would just go and sit among them silently ..this will draw others attention towards you as they know that you are a master of kicks but hence you are simply sitting there with a radiant smile on your face and not speeking one word. This will surely draw them towards you asking for your opinions. Trust me it works .. and it worked for me. Try to stay happy .. sad faces are not good for budding friendships.
And when it is time for sparing donot spare anyone ..I mean it ..show them what you are .
Remember Talent attracts company .. just be humble .. and show them that you are happy.. Always remember be charismatic with little attitude , and thats all it takes. hope this helps .
 
I don't think a bunch of physical punches and kicks are making you emotionally upset. With these friends not acting nice to you, it's not what happens to you that defines who you are, it's what you do. What happens to you sprouts from them, and what you do sprouts from you. Talk with them about what's up and how you feel.
 
Like others have stated. Talk with your instructor. It sounds like some things in the dojo needs to be addressed. Other things you have to address within yourself.

It may be easier said than done for some, but you have to let go of what other say or how they treat you. You are there to train, not make friends. However, making friend is often a by-product of training. Once you let some things go you should be able to release the stress and enjoy training even more.
 
Instead of worrying about others try to improve yourself first. If the "friends" you had laugh at you and bring you down then they were never your friends to begin with, let them go. As for helping others, its always good to lend a helping hand but read and relate to the situation and try to find the ones who could really use your help. It sounds like you are annoying some people, maybe focusing more on them than yourself? Let the instructor do his/her job and try to keep your mind focused on your goals.

Be a Rhino.
 
Tell your instructor what you said here. If he is a good instructor he will have a good solution. If not then you might want to start over in a different school.


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