I've lost my social life since having my baby, but her father is having

[MissTClark]

even more fun now....help!? I have a 7 month old daughter. Her father and I are still together but long distance. See, when I got pregnant I couldn't live on campus anymore and I chose not to live with my boyfriend so I had to move to TX to live with my mom, and of course I took my baby with me. I won't be moving back until I am done saving up my goal amount to get my own apt with..but anyway, I knew I would have to change my life and make sacrifices, that's not the problem. The problem is that my boyfriend didn't give up ANYTHING, actually his life seems to be getting better while I am struggling to do everything. By him being 4 hours away, (We try to visit each other like every 5 weeks) I can't just drop her off to him when I'm ready. He goes to the same college I had to leave and he's always telling me about this party he's going to and that event he's going to and it makes me FURIOUS to think that he is living his life so freely and It is not even an option for me. I just dont know what to do. I really don't and it makes me just want to curse him out and never speak to him again, I just don't think it's fair. How do I deal with this, like how do I better accept this?

And please don't criticize me, I know I should have been more responsible, but we all make mistakes I just need some good, mature,and sound advice. Thanks

 

[AnnaOg]

One more time. A Baby is not a mistake. It is a consequence of irresponsible behavior..but

Why is he not paying his part of the baby bills?

He needs to be paying support for the baby. That will cut his partying down a bit.
Unfortunately these are the results of your actions. Leaving school, etc. why did you quit school? Couldn't live on campus? IF you two were living together he would not be off partying. He would be taking care of the family he created. Which is only right. Going home might have seemed a good idea but you let him slide big time. Not much you can do about it unless you go back. You are going to end up a single mother because you will get so mad that you will break up over this...unless YOU grow up and accept this is part of what is going to happen until you get on your feet. It is his child and your are the child's mother, He needs to be paying his share.

Life is Not Fair . Get used to it

 

[GoNavyttt]

Well, to start off with he is immature and selfish. If it were me I would want to see her every weekend. Does he have his own place? If so, you could have him take her every other weekend. Although, it doesn't even sound like I would trust him around my baby. The fact is that you moved 4 hours away and that does put all the burden on you...which is unfortunate. Does he have a job and at least help support you and the baby financially? I think you need to talk to him and let him know that if he is going to be selfish then he doesn't need to be in your life. That is a different issue all together. The only way to make him take some responsibility is to move back that way or move in with him and make him do something. Sorry I couldn't be more helpful.

 

[GoNavyttt]

Well, to start off with he is immature and selfish. If it were me I would want to see her every weekend. Does he have his own place? If so, you could have him take her every other weekend. Although, it doesn't even sound like I would trust him around my baby. The fact is that you moved 4 hours away and that does put all the burden on you...which is unfortunate. Does he have a job and at least help support you and the baby financially? I think you need to talk to him and let him know that if he is going to be selfish then he doesn't need to be in your life. That is a different issue all together. The only way to make him take some responsibility is to move back that way or move in with him and make him do something. Sorry I couldn't be more helpful.

 

[GoNavyttt]

Well, to start off with he is immature and selfish. If it were me I would want to see her every weekend. Does he have his own place? If so, you could have him take her every other weekend. Although, it doesn't even sound like I would trust him around my baby. The fact is that you moved 4 hours away and that does put all the burden on you...which is unfortunate. Does he have a job and at least help support you and the baby financially? I think you need to talk to him and let him know that if he is going to be selfish then he doesn't need to be in your life. That is a different issue all together. The only way to make him take some responsibility is to move back that way or move in with him and make him do something. Sorry I couldn't be more helpful.

 

[2hearts1]

If your boyfriend is going to college to make a better life for you and your baby then I would keep that in mind everytime I got mad.

If he isn't planning on making a life for the 2 of you after he graduates then I would try to emotionally detach myself from him, and concentrate on raising your child.

Remember: HE is missing out on raising your baby. You can't ever get those years back. You have the best job in world. Being a Mom!!

 

[vash]

focus on your child. thats the most important part of your life and she needs you to be happy so dont spend a lot of time feeling bad. actually let him know all th wonderful stuff hes missing

 

[vash]

focus on your child. thats the most important part of your life and she needs you to be happy so dont spend a lot of time feeling bad. actually let him know all th wonderful stuff hes missing