Make a wish, .. and have it corrupted!

granted but it reduces your sex drive to that of an 80 yr old man

i wish my girlfriend would get a clue and stop being such a b*tch
 
She has a profound religious experience and becomes the next mother Teresa, however she has taken a vow of celibacy and a vow of silence so you can't figure out what’s wrong with her.


I wish for world peace
 
Granted. but your now sued by all everyone that's been put out of buisness/work by globalised peace and dispised by everyone for the poverty introduced.

I wish that my room/home would be self tidying.

Moony

Pssstt.....TKDguy....i've not got a problem with that, but my boyfriend might complain
 
Granted, but after a few months of cleaning itself, your home begins to feel unappreciated and used, so it developes a drinking problem and eventually goes on a shotgun rampage through your neighborhood.

I wish that green was blue.
 
granted, now the whole color spectrum is out of whack and all the white people turn into smurfs and my sister turns into a pile of


I wish there was no law against killing a sibling
 
You get your car. And in a Stephen-Kingesque twist.... Get eaten by it. Because it's alive!

I wish I could go to China.
 
Your plane lands in China... on fire. (sorry, dont feel like being imaginative)

I wish the steak I eat tonight is the best steak of my life. PLEASE RUTH'S CHRIS! LET IT BE SO!!

(damn velocity diet)
 
Granted, however it was cut from the rump of the celestial cow, who provided milk for the milky way. All the stars in the sky begin to grow stale and turn into cheese, which rains to earth. You are then killed by a mod of angry star crossed lovers whose destinies have been eaten with crackers.

I wish people would stop sending me letter bombs.
 
granted, *sends 100,000 letter bombs to thelistmaker* enjoy


I wish koreans were the first people to discover america
 
Koreans, regardless of the size of their new American Empire, still get invaded by the Japanese who now take ultimate control of America. The whole world becomes wierd like the Japanese, and their silly little robot kitties and artificially intelligent tamagotchi monsters enslave the human race! [That's a joke of course.]

I wish.... Bad Religion would come back to play in England!
 
Wish Granted, They come back or at least you think they do after u buy your tickets you find out at the show that its a cover band one which ads their own twist to the music A POLKA TWIST!!!!

I wish i was a pirate!
 
granted, but then you get caught by the coast guard and hanged at the gallows good job bob


I wish people would stop making Martial Arts a freaking lifestyle.
 
Granted, but now there are no quality instructors left in the world and it is impossible to find a school that isn't a McDojo/McDojang/McKwoon.

I wish my wife was back in town. I'm lonely
 
Granted, but shes with another guy and he beats you up just to impress her and then they walk out together and you start to cry and go on an uncontrollable rampage destroying everything and anything that gets in your path. When you finally calm down you realized you destroyed your house and now your broke leaving you to live on the streets begging people for money

i wish i could fall asleep.
 
Granted, You go into a 'sleeping beutey' style sleep and need a prince to wake you with a kiss. So enters Rick James (the old Rick) and hits you with a huge sloppy herpes (cold sore) covered deep throat tongue kiss! You develop incurable oral herpes, to go along with your post traumatic stress after being tongue lashed by Rick James ..beeyyaaa#%!

(Cant establish your gender, so this one works a hell of a lot better if you're a guy! ) and by the way...cocaine IS one hell of a drug huh?! (long live Dave Chapelle! )

My wish is to be given a Masamune blade in mint condition by the Japanese government, and the appropriate level of security to guard it.
 
granted! but then I come along and kill all the guards and steal your precious sword and cut you down with it along with anyone who gets in my way


I wish all the abusive parents and Extremists were shot in the head.
 
Granted but because of the lack of the abusive parents its puts thousands of social workers and charity workers out of jobs that eventually leads to an economic brake down, in which you lose your job then aliens seeing earths weakness invade and anilate everyone on the planet for no apparant reason.

I wish i had a normal pet cat with no abnormalities, and that wouldnt kill me or hurt me or cause aliens to invade or do anything along those lines. (lets see you corrupt that one )
 
It gets run over the same day you get it. The person feels so bad it ran over you cat, he feels the need to kill you and your whole family so you can meet in heaven together.

I wish I was nothing could kill me.
 
An artillary shell lands on you on day blowing you into tiny bits, however your still alive and can feel everyhting for eternity.

I wish i had a enourmous foot...
 
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