more ok with young parent or young marriage?

[FutureMrseDowns]

it seems like more and more people these days look down more on people getting married young than people having children young. i would think people would see having a child young and not married would be worse than just getting married young.
if getting married young doest work there is divorce
but having a child young with someone that you might not be with or get married to is permanant.
its like with a kid your permanently attached to that person for life, but with marriage you choose to be attached, and if things dont work out you divorce.

idk, its because im getting married and i will be 20 when i get married and some of my friends are negative about it saying im too young, when one of my friends had a baby at 18 and the father wasnt in the picture and they never said anything negative to her.
it just seems like people have put more of a negative stigma on getting married young than it is to have a child young.

what are your views on this topic.

 

[Lincoel]

Every situation is different. However, two wrongs do not make a right. Many young people who marry do so because a child is on it's way. I think a lot of people recognize that even a non-youthful marriage will be strained by the introduction of a baby. Children take a lot of energy and a lot of time reducing the odds that a youthful marriage will make it.

I don't think being a young parent or being a young marriage is a good thing. Overall statistics back me up on this. While there are exceptions to every rule, early parents tend to be less prepared than older parents - single or otherwise - and young marrieds have a dramatically higher divorce rate than people postponing marriage until they are closer to 30.

I find your question interesting because it seems to me that you want people to say it is okay for you to marry. It's like you are seeking positive reinforcement. I suspect that the less than enthusiastic response you have received towards you marriage is wearing on you. But understand, the enthusiasm is tempered because so many people have seen so many young marriages fail. People will actually want to support you, but they simply can't help holding their breath.

 

[Lincoel]

Every situation is different. However, two wrongs do not make a right. Many young people who marry do so because a child is on it's way. I think a lot of people recognize that even a non-youthful marriage will be strained by the introduction of a baby. Children take a lot of energy and a lot of time reducing the odds that a youthful marriage will make it.

I don't think being a young parent or being a young marriage is a good thing. Overall statistics back me up on this. While there are exceptions to every rule, early parents tend to be less prepared than older parents - single or otherwise - and young marrieds have a dramatically higher divorce rate than people postponing marriage until they are closer to 30.

I find your question interesting because it seems to me that you want people to say it is okay for you to marry. It's like you are seeking positive reinforcement. I suspect that the less than enthusiastic response you have received towards you marriage is wearing on you. But understand, the enthusiasm is tempered because so many people have seen so many young marriages fail. People will actually want to support you, but they simply can't help holding their breath.