I've written part of the first chapter but I guess I need like 8 more pages to make a full chapter, read it and take a look? any comments, ideas and anything else. please dont use my story or idea, sorry i want to continue writing it. thanks!
Two soft lights made their way up Silver Hill. A loud crack, as if a fence or a tree had fallen over, echoed as the rain hit down hard.
“Well,” Nic sighed, “I don’t imagine we’ll be seeing anyone to ask for the time.”
“You fool, is the time all you can think of?” a voice grumbled, “We’re lost and I doubt the first question I’m going to ask if I see anyone is the time.”
Nic held his torch so he could see his sister’s face, which was red from the cold, “Calm down Penny. Why are you so worried?”
Penny snatched his torch and threw it over her head, “How can I calm down? We don’t know where we are and I think the rain is getting heavier! When we get home I’m blaming everything on you. Now go and get the stupid torch.”
Nic scampered off, looking for the torch in only the faint glow of Penny’s torch. She was getting tired of standing out in the rain, waiting for her brother to find his torch and let out a groan.
“Ugh, Nic hurry up will you?”
“I haven’t found it,” called Nic after a good five minutes of searching, “Can you help me instead of sulking?”
Penny stormed over to where Nic was. The first thing she wanted to do was kick him and then push him down the hill, this was all his fault. But before she could do that, she slipped and fell.
“Nic!” she called out, “Nic where are you?!”
“Penny?” yelled Nic.
No reply.
“Oh god, Penny?!”
Nothing.
By now Nic had found his torch, banged it against the side of his leg to get it to work and scanned the darkness for any sign of her torch. Where the hell was she?
“Penny this isn’t funny,” he shouted, “Answer me!”
A sudden crack of thunder made Nic jump and he turned around. He flashed his torch around randomly until something caught his eye. This something was sliver, it had something sticky on it and it was sharp.
“A knife,” Nic whispered to himself, “A knife with blood on it? Nah, it can’t be. It’s just paint.” He touched the red with his finger just to make sure, “Smells like paint too.”
He fingered the knife gently and observed how odd it looked. It looked much like a cheese knife, except it was slightly bigger and wider. Still, someone shopping might not have known and assumed it was a cheese knife. Though, why use a cheese knife for painting?
Penny would’ve given them a piece of her mind….
“Penny,” he shouted out again. This time he heard something. He listened again, yes it was defiantly something. Nic tucked the knife into his jacked and ran in the direction he thought it was coming from.
Nic ran, the rain had stopped and it was starting to get lighter, a sign that he and Penny had been out for a while. Dad was going to kill him if he didn’t bring Penny home; he was going to kill himself.
Then, he heard it, “Nic, Nic where are you, Nic?!”
It was Penny, a frantic Penny. Where had she been?
“Penny?” called Nic, “I’m over here, it’s alright.”
“Nic I found a café. We can go and ask directions there.”
“Good idea,” so that’s where she was, “Where do we go?”
Penny ran over to her brother and pulled on his jacket, “Over here, just follow me.”
They both ran for at least ten minutes until they came to a cozy looking building.
Nic gazed up in amazement; there was an odd carving on the roof. Now where had he seen that before?
“Come on!” laughed Penny happily, “Let’s go inside.”
Nic was dragged in. The warmth from a pizza oven behind the counter was a nice change to the cold they had just been wandering around in.
He stopped to observe his surroundings, caramel colours covered the walls and ceiling, a faded blue carpet was spread out neatly on the floor and low hung lamps swung to and fro. The pink candy coloured chairs looked perfect against the white tables and the yellow table cloths gave the place an innocent look.
“Two mugs of hot chocolate and the time please,” smiled penny to the man behind the counter. He nodded and went about preparing them.
Nic tilted his head to one side as he watched the man work; he was fast and didn’t even lift his head once to reach for anything. He knew exactly where everything was. Once or twice his long fringe got in the way of his eyes, but even so he worked with extreme speed.
“Um, excuse me,” said Nic, startling the man, “If you wouldn’t mind telling us the time.”
“Oh,” the man paused and blew the hair out of his eyes, “Oh yes, the time is exactly five minutes past one.”
“Have we been out that long?” Penny asked as she grabbed the drinks and went over to a nearby table, “Gosh.”
“Gosh is right,” said Nic, lowering his voice to a whisper, “Now where are we?”
“I think,” Penny yawned, “Well, at least I’m pretty sure, that we’re in Old Springstin.”
“I’ve never heard of such nonsense, why I know Old Springstin like the back of my hand.”
“Well you obviously don’t k
Two soft lights made their way up Silver Hill. A loud crack, as if a fence or a tree had fallen over, echoed as the rain hit down hard.
“Well,” Nic sighed, “I don’t imagine we’ll be seeing anyone to ask for the time.”
“You fool, is the time all you can think of?” a voice grumbled, “We’re lost and I doubt the first question I’m going to ask if I see anyone is the time.”
Nic held his torch so he could see his sister’s face, which was red from the cold, “Calm down Penny. Why are you so worried?”
Penny snatched his torch and threw it over her head, “How can I calm down? We don’t know where we are and I think the rain is getting heavier! When we get home I’m blaming everything on you. Now go and get the stupid torch.”
Nic scampered off, looking for the torch in only the faint glow of Penny’s torch. She was getting tired of standing out in the rain, waiting for her brother to find his torch and let out a groan.
“Ugh, Nic hurry up will you?”
“I haven’t found it,” called Nic after a good five minutes of searching, “Can you help me instead of sulking?”
Penny stormed over to where Nic was. The first thing she wanted to do was kick him and then push him down the hill, this was all his fault. But before she could do that, she slipped and fell.
“Nic!” she called out, “Nic where are you?!”
“Penny?” yelled Nic.
No reply.
“Oh god, Penny?!”
Nothing.
By now Nic had found his torch, banged it against the side of his leg to get it to work and scanned the darkness for any sign of her torch. Where the hell was she?
“Penny this isn’t funny,” he shouted, “Answer me!”
A sudden crack of thunder made Nic jump and he turned around. He flashed his torch around randomly until something caught his eye. This something was sliver, it had something sticky on it and it was sharp.
“A knife,” Nic whispered to himself, “A knife with blood on it? Nah, it can’t be. It’s just paint.” He touched the red with his finger just to make sure, “Smells like paint too.”
He fingered the knife gently and observed how odd it looked. It looked much like a cheese knife, except it was slightly bigger and wider. Still, someone shopping might not have known and assumed it was a cheese knife. Though, why use a cheese knife for painting?
Penny would’ve given them a piece of her mind….
“Penny,” he shouted out again. This time he heard something. He listened again, yes it was defiantly something. Nic tucked the knife into his jacked and ran in the direction he thought it was coming from.
Nic ran, the rain had stopped and it was starting to get lighter, a sign that he and Penny had been out for a while. Dad was going to kill him if he didn’t bring Penny home; he was going to kill himself.
Then, he heard it, “Nic, Nic where are you, Nic?!”
It was Penny, a frantic Penny. Where had she been?
“Penny?” called Nic, “I’m over here, it’s alright.”
“Nic I found a café. We can go and ask directions there.”
“Good idea,” so that’s where she was, “Where do we go?”
Penny ran over to her brother and pulled on his jacket, “Over here, just follow me.”
They both ran for at least ten minutes until they came to a cozy looking building.
Nic gazed up in amazement; there was an odd carving on the roof. Now where had he seen that before?
“Come on!” laughed Penny happily, “Let’s go inside.”
Nic was dragged in. The warmth from a pizza oven behind the counter was a nice change to the cold they had just been wandering around in.
He stopped to observe his surroundings, caramel colours covered the walls and ceiling, a faded blue carpet was spread out neatly on the floor and low hung lamps swung to and fro. The pink candy coloured chairs looked perfect against the white tables and the yellow table cloths gave the place an innocent look.
“Two mugs of hot chocolate and the time please,” smiled penny to the man behind the counter. He nodded and went about preparing them.
Nic tilted his head to one side as he watched the man work; he was fast and didn’t even lift his head once to reach for anything. He knew exactly where everything was. Once or twice his long fringe got in the way of his eyes, but even so he worked with extreme speed.
“Um, excuse me,” said Nic, startling the man, “If you wouldn’t mind telling us the time.”
“Oh,” the man paused and blew the hair out of his eyes, “Oh yes, the time is exactly five minutes past one.”
“Have we been out that long?” Penny asked as she grabbed the drinks and went over to a nearby table, “Gosh.”
“Gosh is right,” said Nic, lowering his voice to a whisper, “Now where are we?”
“I think,” Penny yawned, “Well, at least I’m pretty sure, that we’re in Old Springstin.”
“I’ve never heard of such nonsense, why I know Old Springstin like the back of my hand.”
“Well you obviously don’t k