ThaliaAlexander
New member
- Mar 19, 2011
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I had an ugly childhood. My father was a hard man to please, he was a drunkard, my mother was no more better then a cattle at shed,
; a typical indian wife who had given up everything and seldom cared of anything. She never bothered what the childrens are doing, how they are living, how they are studying. Sometimes after drinking alcohol my mother used to get lot of beating in front of us. Some how I and my brother grew up in this bad environment. Growing up here did made my will strong of not giving up in life. I always concentrated at my studies and the hate toward my father just convinced me that I wud never be like him. My brother, he always followed me, trying to do what I used to do. Eventually I and my brother Graduated in Engineering and got into job. Later, after lot of pushing from my relatives, I found a preety girl from a decent family to marry. I alone went to her house, asking her for marriage from her parents. So it was totally my own choice, my own decision to marry her. We got married and she started staying with me. We used to stay alone, the initial days passed hapily. I rarely cared of her cooking, which used to be horrible in taste, her living style etc. because I felt that slowly she will adapt and will be a how I wanted her to be. She is a vegetarian by cooking habit and I am a hard core non-vegetarian, who would love having meat daily in food. 8months passed and she conceived, while she was 6 month pregnent I sent her to her parents and 3 months later I got a lovely son. And later after staying for some more days she returned back to me. 5 - 6 months passed, she was the same at her cooking. Her cooking was still terrible, She was a girl with a phobia of infection (Molysomophobia) cleaning floor two to three times a day due to which she never cooked in time. Lot of arguement started between us and evetually it became bad to worse. I found that along with her cooking and fear of infection, she did had a very short temper and used to throw costly house hold items when she was upset. For me going for lunch at house was a punishment. She would never clean TV, Refregerator, bathroom or verandah but the floor of house would be cleaned number of times. I always used to poke her, pointed her, shouted at her to improve but all in vain. What ever I wanted, she will do in front of me but the next day everything will be same. Now my son was 1 years old and still the condition was same. I remember loosing my control to such extent that I hit her badly number of times. One day after I slapped her due to her provocation, she fel down and started bleeding from her nose. I just found myself in between what I was never wanted to be. Its like I was the villain like my father but there was a difference, my father never went to my mom to convince and console her, it was my mother who used to come begging and persuading, here it was me, who always used to go to her asking her to be normal. I really love my son and wanted to give him everything which I missed as a child. I am a doing good in life - have a good position, I get a good salary and leaving aside my wife issue, I have everything that can help me give my son whatever I had hoped for him. Sometime, I think of leaving my wife permanently but then I think of my child. I know I can't take care of him by myself. I just don't want him to curse me like I do for my father. I would appreciate your comment on my condition, I am sure opinion of someone from you will definetly help me.
; a typical indian wife who had given up everything and seldom cared of anything. She never bothered what the childrens are doing, how they are living, how they are studying. Sometimes after drinking alcohol my mother used to get lot of beating in front of us. Some how I and my brother grew up in this bad environment. Growing up here did made my will strong of not giving up in life. I always concentrated at my studies and the hate toward my father just convinced me that I wud never be like him. My brother, he always followed me, trying to do what I used to do. Eventually I and my brother Graduated in Engineering and got into job. Later, after lot of pushing from my relatives, I found a preety girl from a decent family to marry. I alone went to her house, asking her for marriage from her parents. So it was totally my own choice, my own decision to marry her. We got married and she started staying with me. We used to stay alone, the initial days passed hapily. I rarely cared of her cooking, which used to be horrible in taste, her living style etc. because I felt that slowly she will adapt and will be a how I wanted her to be. She is a vegetarian by cooking habit and I am a hard core non-vegetarian, who would love having meat daily in food. 8months passed and she conceived, while she was 6 month pregnent I sent her to her parents and 3 months later I got a lovely son. And later after staying for some more days she returned back to me. 5 - 6 months passed, she was the same at her cooking. Her cooking was still terrible, She was a girl with a phobia of infection (Molysomophobia) cleaning floor two to three times a day due to which she never cooked in time. Lot of arguement started between us and evetually it became bad to worse. I found that along with her cooking and fear of infection, she did had a very short temper and used to throw costly house hold items when she was upset. For me going for lunch at house was a punishment. She would never clean TV, Refregerator, bathroom or verandah but the floor of house would be cleaned number of times. I always used to poke her, pointed her, shouted at her to improve but all in vain. What ever I wanted, she will do in front of me but the next day everything will be same. Now my son was 1 years old and still the condition was same. I remember loosing my control to such extent that I hit her badly number of times. One day after I slapped her due to her provocation, she fel down and started bleeding from her nose. I just found myself in between what I was never wanted to be. Its like I was the villain like my father but there was a difference, my father never went to my mom to convince and console her, it was my mother who used to come begging and persuading, here it was me, who always used to go to her asking her to be normal. I really love my son and wanted to give him everything which I missed as a child. I am a doing good in life - have a good position, I get a good salary and leaving aside my wife issue, I have everything that can help me give my son whatever I had hoped for him. Sometime, I think of leaving my wife permanently but then I think of my child. I know I can't take care of him by myself. I just don't want him to curse me like I do for my father. I would appreciate your comment on my condition, I am sure opinion of someone from you will definetly help me.