Need help with my boyfriend. we argue and he lies all the time?

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PersoneP

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Okayy so he's 18 and I'm 16. And yes, my parents do know about him and are fine with it. We've been dating for about a year and 2 months.and about 7 months ago I started noticing him checking out other girls... yeah, made me feel like a worthless piece of trash and he could do better. I told him how it made me feel and that I saw him do it but he just denied and denied and denied. Finally last month I got sick of him telling me "its all in yer head" "your the only girl I look at" "I don't ever even want to look at any other girls" "I don't look at other girls" "just believe me please".. it makes me feel so down on myself. I wasn't believing him most days. But when he tells that straight to my face everyday for the past months, its hard to believe he does it. About 3 days ago I finally got him to admit to it. I feel.. betrayed. He was doing what makes me feel the lowest about myself all while lying when he was looking me in the eyes telling me he loved me after. Honestly, I go places and don't even have the want to look at oter boys, and I don't check out other boys, sure I notice if someones cute, fat, white, .. my little sister thats 8 can do that.. so I don't consider it checking someone out. Its like, if I'm the only girl he wants why does he even look once? I asked him if he stares at other girls and he said it doesn't mean anything.. therefore he does. Now.. looking once is one thing, but staring? Really? I lost my virginity to him and he lost his to me.. that means a lot to me. He means the world to me. It hurts me so much and he knows it but he still goes out and does it. So last night I told him I forgave him for lying to me but I wasn't gonna forget it and he was all happy but then I asked him again and he said he stares, looks twice and whatever, so I felt like enough was enough. He's cried on my shoulder telling me I'm the one he wants and never wants to lose. I just don't get it. I told him to go home and not to come back until he KNEW I was going to be
the only girl he'll ever look at, he cried and asked for one more hug so I hugged him and he left crying. I hate making him cry but he's made me everyday for the past 6 months. He just tears my heart apart. Please help? I need advice, good advice.
 
it doesn't mean anything
he probably only lied because he knew it bothered you so much
he isn't intentionally trying to hurt you
he probably doesn't do it consciously (can't help it)

you could break up
but many guys do this
it is tied to evolutionary mating behaviors and is different between genders

he doesn't care about these other girls
when he says he loves you, he probably means it as much as any person that age can mean it
people like looking at nice things/attractive people

if you can't be okay with this, you will probably need to break up
but you could also just tell him how it makes you feel and ask him to try to stop
when he does it anyway, he will probably reassure you and mean it
you could say that you don't like it, but you understand

if you think the lying is a big deal
tell him you want the truth regardless of what he thinks it will do to your feelings
(at least for things you think are important [not about clothes])
lying is intentional, so let him know how much it upsets you (he will stop lying if he cares)


good luck
 
Jeez thats tough, really your decision. From what you have said it seems like he is a 'tool' who is just playing at the moment. to gain trust, you NEED to tell him that he is treating you like crap and I really do not seeing this work out if you keep on changing personalities. Sorry but there are better people who will love you more than he ever could and would only think of you as his girl and not check out others. Your still young so think about it :)
 
Too much drama for two young kids.
Break it off. Obviously you are both
immature and all that this "relationship" will bring is
jealousy, arguing and distrust with a lot of unnecessary drama.
 
Blame it on youth. You will encounter this always. Boys are boys
 
it is natural for a boy to check out other girls even if you are with him. unfortunately, most guys ( adult men included) can't help themselves. they ARE comparing what they see with what they have. you win every time he looks back at you. most times, it means nothing.
 
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