Need to painlessly poison and kill my neighbor's dogs?

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I'm firmly of the belief that if pricks allow their dogs to annoy others then they should lose their dog as a result....especially if it's allowed to bark at night. Even the dumbest cunt on earth knows that constant barking has gotta be a pain for their neighbors so they have no excuse.

I agree. They have no excuse, but the pricks get away with it because of useless councils. Councils only have themselves to blame for dogs that have been baited.
 
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"I'm firmly of the belief that if pricks allow their dogs to annoy others then they should lose their dog as a result....especially if it's allowed to bark at night. Even the dumbest cunt on earth knows that constant barking has gotta be a pain for their neighbors so they have no excuse."

I agree. The pricks have no excuse, but they get away with it because of useless local councils. Councils only have themselves to blame when people take matters into their own hands.
 
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So, have anybody tried the sponge way, lately? If so, can you tell us what it was like? It makes sense as a bait, dog should be drawn to it and hopefully eat it up, but then why shouldn't he trow up as soon as he gets sick and live?
 
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So, have anybody tried the sponge way, lately? If so, can you tell us what it was like? It makes sense as a bait, dog should be drawn to it and hopefully eat it up, but then why shouldn't he trow up as soon as he gets sick and live?

I was going to try it last week but the nuisance dog's earned itself a temporary reprieve as it has been quite a bit quieter since the spring weather arrived. I still hate the sound it makes when it does bark, and wish to God it would die, but it didn't seem like wasting some lovely roast lamb gravy on that ridiculous little thing. I'm sure it'll find form again and start bugging me, and when it does I'm certainly going to give the sponge a go. I'll let you know who it goes.

Good luck with yours. I think the idea is that the dog can't puke the sponge up as it's be stuck in the dog's innards.
 
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What I meant to say in the above message was:

I was going to try it last week but the nuisance dog's earned itself a temporary reprieve as it has been quite a bit quieter since the spring weather arrived. I still hate the sound it makes when it does bark, and wish to God it would die, but it didn't seem worth wasting some lovely roast lamb gravy on that ridiculous little thing. I'm sure it'll find form again and start bugging me, and when it does I'm certainly going to give the sponge a go. I'll let you know how it goes.

Good luck with yours. I think the idea is that the dog can't puke the sponge up as it's be stuck in the dog's innards.
 
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Right on. Do you feel confident about the roast lamb gravy, by the way?? seriously, which home made gravy has best chance to make the dog eat this goddam sponge? tomato, bolognese, roast...whatever?
 
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How old are you? Can you read? My 5 year old daughter has a better grasp of language than that which you have demonstrated here. You should kill yourself, and anyone else you know that suffers from this magnitude of ignorance. Thanks in advance.

Love, all the people in the world who are embarrassed and enraged to be surrounded by illiterate fucks.
 
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Oh goody, we've got a troll! He says we're illiterate, but doesn't he know that ages expressed as adjectives need hyphens? Five-year-old, you twerp. Also that comma after "yourself" is pretty dodgy, though I'm in a good mood so I'll let him off as he's clearly a retard.

To answer the nice poster before him (or her, or it): Any meat gravy should do the trick, though I'm somewhat doubtful that canine vermin would be attracted to anything with tomato in it. I may be wrong, of course.

I hope you all have a bark-free Easter!
 
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Alright here's a battle report.

This listing will not tell how to kill a dog, it will simply debunk all the hoaxes. I personally haven't found a way as dogs are immortal. When you've heard of people physically attacking a neighbor's dog, it is likely because they tried everything possible and found the dog immortal to everything and were desperate.


-ULTRASONICS-

I once lived at a place with small yards and a chainlinked fence. Across the way was a large dog that started barking around 11am and kept it up nonstop till about 2:30a most nights. It was barking at nothing. I went on eBay and buying custom parts and with help, got the strongest ultrasonic device ever. First, humans hear these at whatever frequency. I once visited family friends who had a neighbor with one of these going all the time on his front yard to keep away cats and it was ultrasonic but when loud enough humans can still hear and be affected by them. Anyway back to my project, well I had something about 20 feet away extremely loud aimed right at the dog. Supposedly doing this extreme thing 24 hours a day was the only way to stop them as it would wear them out. But this dog it had no effect on and it just would do its loud nonstop bark-howling from around 11pm to 2:30am like clockwork. It never even avoided the ultrasound and just didn't mind it at all. It didn't change its pattern at all. The only positive effect of the ultrasound was it seemed to keep bugs away, even though it's not supposed to.

I've used this setup in other situations and it never affected dogs. Eventually the speakers broke.


-POISONS-

Chocolate -- This one of the main hoax foods that supposedly kill dog. In reality, a dog has to eat nearly its own weight in baking chocolate to die, and it also cannot throw it up. Dogs usually throw it up, then often try to eat their own vomit. For a dog to die of chocolate, onions, and all the various foods, it would have to have its liver and kidneys basically about dead already either from old age or eating bad food. Dogs often like to sneak bad food on their own all the time. While some of it isn't good for it, I would compare with how humans drink alcohol and then throw it up but very rarely overdose from it. Humans eat all kinds of unhealthy food from high cholesterol, GMO foods (which rats won't even eat), fluoridated water (proven to ower IQs by 10 points, and encourage mental illness). You can personally buy a 1 pound bag of baking chocolate and eat it yourself all at once. You will feel ill with heart beating but won't die. Chocolate and other food killing a dog is a complete hoax.

Antifreeze (ethylene glycol without the extreme embittering agents forced into the products today) -- Over 10 years ago when this stuff could be bought without the embittering agent denatonium benzoate used to the highest amounts, I soaked it in bread and threw it at a dog barking all night. The dog eat it immediately. It never died. Though a day or two later the young couple there (they looked like nice upperclass people but they let their dog bark all night and never noticed it) seemed to give me suspicious glances but it could be my imagination. Then 1-2 months later they moved out. Nothing was ever said to me.

Raisins - I've researched on the internet people feed their dogs raisins and grapes all the time and the dogs are fine and they think it is pesticides. I heard one story of a person's dog that eat grapes outside and died, and my guess is the grapes had pesticides on them. Nobody knows what in raisins or grapes is supposed to affect dogs either, so probably pesticides. Well, for my attempts, dogs do not eat plain raisins. They just won't. Chocolate covered raisins however they eat and like. Chocolate covered raisins are very expensive for a tiny amount (a shame as they're very tasty to me personally) and dogs can eat tons and they're just fine. These are supposed to damage kidneys and even if it does, acute damage of a kidney gets repaired, only chronic damage kills them. I tried for over a week and just nothing so raisins and grapes alone are a hoax.

xylitol - This is the biggest hoax ever! It is claimed the tiniest amount kills dogs, though these people never actually tested it. There was a lab in china that ran a test. About two thirds of the dogs got hypoglycemia temporarily and none of them died. Hypoglycemia is from too much insulin. In mental hospitals, they used to put people to sleep with insulin injections so it's not like it's deadly. The claim is that too much hypoglycemia can stop the heart, but this has never happened in a dog. The only cases are liver damage from eating too much. Now in reality, the liver is a very resilient organ, to quite Wikipedia, "as little as 25% of a liver can regenerate into a whole liver." The only way a liver goes out is from chronic damage so even if the liver is harmed, it will return. For my attempts, one I tried a dollar store bag of dog food mixed with a 1/2 pound of xylitol soaked in through. The dogs occasionally ate it along with their own food, but didn't eat that much. 20 hours after I threw it, the owner swept up all the spilled food (which was actually what I threw) into the garbage. The dogs became lazier and sleepier, barking less for a day and a half. After that nothing. I tried again a week later using only a small bit of dog food with a 1/2 pound of xylitol soaked into it. This time they refused to eat it at all, despite xylitol supposedly being sugary and good tasting to them. The owner did not clean up the mess and eventually birds at the food over the course of a week.

caffeine -- Okay once I had about 7 200mg caffeine pills personally from an overdose (they took many hours to kick in so I figured I needed more). My heart felt like it was going to give out, and then the next three days my head felt like it was going to explode and I threw up nonstop. I mostly just sat on the bathtub's ledge by the toilet throwing up. I had the advantage of being about to drink lots of water a vitamin C. Okay so well I try crushing up some 200mg pills in peanut butter to the dog. (It is a lot of work to crush these up and a pain.) Note peanut butter is hell to throw and needs to be frozen or put on something else or most will go on your fence. Anyway, what went over was my guess about 75 of these pills. The next morning when it's light the dog looks very sick and foams at the mouth. Owners do not take it to the vet and ignore the dog as usual. For the first day the dog is sick and won't eat and rarely barks. The next 3 days it is hyper and the next 3 days after that it is sluggish, then back to normal. The next time I throw the peanut butter right and get the dog with 180 200mg pills. The dog being immortal gets hyper for 3 days and then is normal. This is madness! An amount far in excess to kill a human has no effect on a large dog.


-PHYSICAL/INTESTINAL-

crushed glass in peanut butter -- I have heard claims people killed dogs this way. I haven't tried it myself because it's a real pain to crush this up and not leave glass shards everywhere, cut myself, etc. I researched it and Snopes says people using crushed glass to kill is a hoax. This is to kill humans too, not dogs. They found it's a hoax and people don't die from it. Of course Snopes says chocolate, raisins, and xylitol kill dogs just because some authoritative agencies spread hoaxes of this and these substances don't.

sponges -- Bowel obstruction is a good idea as dogs regularly eat sponges, tampons, socks, toys, bottle caps, paper towels, paper, and so on and actually live too. This is normal for them. Nobody ever would think it was intentional. However, well the problem is dogs don't eat the stuff. Okay, so throwing a natural sponge (that shrinks a lot) compacted with rubber bands like the forum said, then soaked in gravy, then frozen so the gravy doesn't drip a trail, The result is the next morning, the sponge is its full size. I can't see the rubber bands. I also can't see gravy residue. The sponges come with a small string too that I cut off and include in the gravy mixing hope they would swallow them. Even the string is uneaten. Basically the dog chews the sponges, sucks the gravy out, and refuses to eat them. I tried twice. On page 55 (yes I read all the posts on this thread) someone claims the dog died within a day of eating a sponge--for this to happen, it needs a complete bowel obstruction which is extreme, and I think that post is fiction.

paper towels soaked in syrup -- Okay so to make sure they can't suck the juices out and to make sure they are easy to chew, I used a roll of paper towels soaked in a large bottle of maple syrup. It had to be mixed around and mashed up and it took two large bowls and 30-45 minutes of work. I threw them over. I heard 15 seconds of chewing, and that was it, no more. The next morning with light, I see even the smallest clumps that are easy to swallow were uneaten. All the paper towels were brown from the syrup and the dogs didn't even bother sucking them out, they just ignored them. By the way the neighbor with dogs lets his yard be full of trash. He had one old dog that every few hours would howl for 30 minutes and whine because it was ignored. So they got one of the largest possible breeds, and while huge, still young and tears up everything and they just left a mess of paper, foam, garbage bags, and garbage all over the yard so sponges and paper towels don't stand out. Oh and he ignores his second dog too which is extremely loud and barks all the time. He got it because he must have figured out I can drown out the first dog with earplugs combined with a very loud fan or I can simply give it attention to make it feel less lonely, but the second dog is so loud nothing works.



I haven't tried rat poison since it's easy to cure with lot sof time and strychnine is impossible to get without mail ordering and even then they add a strong embittering agent.



So does anyone have any ideas on why nothing is working?
 
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Thank you for the detailed and informative post. What you write reflects my own experiences. I have used tried of the methods you describe (some several times) to try to get rid of a yappy dog, and all to no avail. I was beginning to feel like a failure so your information is reassuring in that respect, at least! I've noticed that nearly all cases of dog poisonings reported in the UK and US press are unsuccessful attempts, which further supports what you write.

You've answered your final question pretty well yourself. The two problems are (a) getting the dog to eat poisoned food and (b) getting the dog to eat enough of it to have an effect. Neither is likely to happen unless you have unrestricted access to the nuisance dog, and that's pretty unlikely. I hope that people reading your post take heed and are deterred from chucking more and more stuff over the fence until they get caught and prosecuted for an attempted poisoning that wouldn't have worked anyway.

I don't know if there really is any practical method for surreptitiously killing a nuisance dog. I wish I did!

So far I've had no interest in buying any iToys, but if they brought out an app that remotely kills dogs, I'd get one tomorrow!

It's a shame that after 150 pages and several years this thread has still not provided a workable solution, but thanks for the very helpful post and I hope all your neighbour's dogs get run over asap!
 
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If the dogs killed your pet, contact the police. Try to make it look like he neglects his pets, so they will be taken away from him and, hopefully, given to a better home.
 
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It's a shame that after 150 pages and several years this thread has still not provided a workable solution, but thanks for the very helpful post and I hope all your neighbour's dogs get run over asap!
i think you got suckered by a troll post....many of the methods mentioned in these pages will work
 
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i think you got suckered by a troll post....many of the methods mentioned in these pages will work

If post #1510 is a troll post it's a pretty good one! It reflects my own experiences and as I said in my reply, I have tried most of the methods on these pages (some several times) with no success. If they work for others than I'm very happy for them!
 
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i think you got suckered by a troll post....many of the methods mentioned in these pages will work

It's no troll. The real troll is claiming that any of these methods work. The internet is full of these fake tips on how to do this or that including poison dogs, neighbor revenge, which are written as pure jokes and none of them work, most are so ridiculous as to be obvious not to work.

Generally dogs don't eat things, or hardly any of things. Like throw something over and it nibbles a little. Then leaves the rest for the owners to find. Then won't eat more unless something new is thrown over. Extremely picky eaters.

I have not tried rat poison as the ones at the store are using some different poisons now instead of the blood thinners and those are meant for rats that naturally are picky eaters.

If you actually have had something work honestly, tell.
 
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It's no troll. The real troll is claiming that any of these methods work.

A quick google brings up tons of stories about dogs being poisoned so it DOES work....you're just trying to discourage people from getting their well deserved peace and quiet
 
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A quick google brings up tons of stories about dogs being poisoned so it DOES work....you're just trying to discourage people from getting their well deserved peace and quiet

Yes, a search brings up quite a few stories, although they are all about the same few incidents. What these incidents all have in common is that the poisoners made their hatred of the dog clearly known and/or made very little attempt to hide their tracks. There aren't many stories about dogs being poisoned without anyone being caught. That's partly because it doesn't make such good headlines, I suppose, but also because it is bloody difficult to give a dog enough poisoned food to kill it without making it obvious what you're doing. That's what recent posters have said, and they're right. Nobody is saying that it's impossible to poison a dog - of course it isn't - but it a lot more difficult than some people would have you believe, if you want to enjoy the subsequent peace at home rather than in prison.

As for trying to discourage people - that's nonsense. I, and others, have just tried to point out that it's not as easy as some people would have you believe.
 
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Well don't make the same mistake as I did and storm round to tell the stupid cunt neighbour to shut her fucking dog up. It feels great while you're doing it until you realise that you've blown your chance of killing that dog for the foreseeable future.
 
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Here's some more info:


Ibuprofin -- People claim on the internet they gave their dog 1,200mg of this as a painkiller and the dog become sedated, cold, and quiet. The reality is even giving a dog 20,000mg of it, does nothing to sedate it. After dogs get this, they are far more energized than ever before, bark more, and bark louder.

Rat poison -- There's two types on the market. D-con uses a long lasting anticoagulant which can be easily counteracted so that's pointless. The other type is bromethalin, which is claimed to kill by brain swelling, but in reality it's merely a highly dilute sedative. A mouse might die from eating it because it eats its small and can eat its entire weight in the stuff. A dog also would have to eat its entire weight in that stuff to die, just like how it would have to eat its entire weight in baking chocolate to die from that--a dog can die from drinking too much water with far less quantity than either of these, and yes you can die from drinking too much water.

Firstly, the one company that makes the bromethalin rat poison puts denatonium benzoate in it. Denatonium benzoate is what they put in antifreeze so no one drinks it. Well they must not put that much because dogs actually really like this stuff, better than meat. On a side-note, D-con does not put this stuff in it.

As for the effectiveness of bromethalin, firstly if you read on Amazon reviews, it says the larger stuff sold in buckets without the mouse trap have the poison extra dilute so a big $40 bucket (which can only be gotten by internet ordering) has less bromethalin than a small $10 thing with the mouse trap. Another good mention from Amazon review, titled "A mouse FOOD, NOT killer!" is, "I have a rat in the house. I put these green bars all around the house. But the only thing happened was that he ate all of them and nothing happened so far. He has eaten so much that even his s*** has turned green. This thing doesn't work at all."

Okay firstly, Home Depot sells the ones that are a little over $14 with tax, the largest size with the mouse trap. These are merely sedatives and never kill dogs (which are immortal demons that feed on suffering they cause like psychic vampires). The largest $14+ one calm one dog for three days, then it starts barking again. The dog does not act sedated. It runs around all active nonstop, even running to the source of barking, but there's two differences, (1) it does not bark, (2) if it has been constantly attacking the other smaller dog in its yard, it will stop doing that. After three days, it starts barking again. After a week, it is back to full barking. After two weeks, it is back to attacking the other dog in its yard.

So you will need to spend about $130 a month constantly feeding a dog a full box of this every three days. You will need to be ditching to big box and huge rat trap in public trash cans, then again for the smaller storage of these. You will need to wear gloves when handling this and clean up the green crumbs it leaves with tissues so it won't mix with stuff on your regular sponges (then flush the tissues down the toilet). It's expensive, but it will keep a dog calm so it won't bark. And well this is the only thing actually helpful I have found. I suppose prescription sleeping pills might be cheaper to calm it, but I can't get those without a paper trail.
 
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