Please read and give me some feedback on the beginning of my story?

K

Katrina

Member
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2798138/1/Adele

Please tell me what you think.
Also,
1. Do you think the prologue works? (It wasn't originally written as the prologue, I just kind of made it into that on a whim)
2. How would you think it needs to be improved so that it feels more like chapters of a published work?
Okay thanks but can you be more specific?
 
C

cricketfan

New member
i dont know who the intended audience of ur story is but i say its not good enough to be published, this is my opinion. and take out the swear word, put "what the hell" instead. seriously, u really need to improve the sentence and add more stuff on it.
 
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