poet material? tell me if you think i have a future?

A

AshleyJ

Member
So much pain the world today
More devastation then words can say
Through it all we come together
Theres no storm we can't weather
The ground shook causing bulidings fall
We rushed in to rebuild them all
A storm caused streets to flood
We became a family by love not blood
Always helping those in need
When they're hungry give them food to feed
If they're cold give them blankets to warm
Provide them with shelter when theres a storm
No matter what helping others out
Letting them smile instead of pout
 
M

Mark

Active member
We all have a future we just can't be sure of our endings. Poet material ? As far as I can tell you have the ability to use words in a nice way. Although the subject matter here although noble is a little too peppered with in your face goody two shoes rhetoric and I'm a little shocked it didn't end with "For only two dollars a day you could feed little punjab and his 23 cousins for 1 month" Be that as it may if you just try not to force a subject and let one flow from your heart with out thinking about it much I really do think you could write some very good stuff. Yes, I think you just might be a fine example of poet material . I'm not an expert and I really did think the hall closet was the restroom the other night................but I can read and I think it's good, really I do.
 
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