Relationship advice opinions pleaseee?

C

cassy

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I've been with my boyfriend for almost four years now things have been up and down with us. He's cheated on me many times, even when i was pregnant. I took him back after i noticed big changes in him. He stopped talking to all the girls, we would spend everyday together and talk all day till the night. But now those big changes are starting to fade. He talks to me every day but not as much, and we don't see each other everyday. I still have a hard time trusting him when he goes out bc of the past, so im constantly paranoid when he does.
Tonight he told me he doesn't talk to me as much bc i always bitch, but its just bc i get mad he doesn't talk to me as much, and i bring up the trust issues.

i want so bad to be with him and we're trying to make it work but i feel like im the only one putting effort into this relationship. i also want so bad to trust him but after all the lies its too hard. Am i suppose to be ok with just talking to him a few times a day IF that? How can i forget the past and trust that he wont cheat?


advice???
***** complain
To wildflower


1. i did get to know him before i commited if you didnt read the 4 year part.
2. And yes i do have girlfriends i wanted to get more opinions which is why this yahoo answers was invented.
3.And really if i have a problem with him i should just stay quiet as long as he's happy? I didnt realize we were in the 1950's.

but thank you for your answer hun : )
 
i dont know if it will work out. as much as it hurts you you may need to end the relationship for youre own health. you'll be better in the end, promise
 
I would leave him. I'm sure there is someone else out there who will treat you the way you want to be treated!

Once a cheater, always a cheater. If you don't trust him then the relationship is going to crumble...

I think you really need to think hard about is this person really good for you & does he bring the best out of you?

I know it's hard to think of leaving them when you still love them, it's hard but it does get easier!

Please do yourself a favour & leave him!
 
in my humble opinion, your relationship is already damaged beyond repair.
 
Easy advice and it may not be what you want to hear is simply leave him.
 
From years of knowledge and seeing the same pattern, you really cant change anybody.
He, or she is who they are period, they have to want to change for themselves not to accomodate anybody else.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it is best to give him the space that he wants, but at the same time make sure he is not playing you either, in regards to keeping you as just a second string tag along, when you can be meeting someone else, and not into playing with your emotions.
 
This r/s may eventually frizzle out... So, try and learn from it, hon. I'd never go out with a guy I didn't trust or one that was still in love with his ex. So next time around, get to know the guy b/f you commit to him.
Also, you have a best girl friend... right? Go visit her or phone her when you just need to ventilate, hon. That's what best girl friends are for; gettin' together and venting. You can't vent with a guy, he only needs to see the good side of you. Guys don't like whining and if you have a problem, they always want to solve it; it frustrates them when you present them a problem that can't be solved. So never unload an issue on a guy that can't be solved. That's venting.
If you love a guy, you should want to make happy memories with him. Make him feel good about himself. He just wants to make you happy and if he can't do that, then shrug, he'll start looking around for someone that will be thrilled to have him make her happy. It's as simple as that hon. Who knew!
 
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