"Thankyou for your service"

[concernedcatluvr]

I've brought it up in other threads that I am currently serving in the military and what I've done during my service. I've been thanked and respected for it, even when a verbal back hand is about to follow. I appreciate it, I really do, but there is a few things I want to say about this to give some people food for thought when they say it to service members, and to paint an image about how I really feel about being told this.

First I want to pose the question, what does one expect an individual serving to reply to this "thankyou for your service" part? I mean honestly, the average civilian who is educated or not has very little idea of what military life entails. They often don't know if they're giving their deepest gratitude to the mail clerk who will never deploy and is just chillin out for 20 years, or the beat to hell, hurt, offended and used infantryman of 8 years. In my opinion, all service is appreciated, but not all service is equal or even worth recognition in some cases. It's a little out of place in my mind to thank somebody for something when you really have no idea what they do, and a little awkward for me (and others I've had this discussion with) to reply with anything since it's my everyday life and you probably don't know much about it at all.

If you think that last statement was a bit too bold, and that everyone in the military deserves a thankyou then let me share this story with you. I was in a patrol base in which medical evacuation helicopters brought casualties from out in the field. This PB consisted mainly of logistics personel. They ran around the PB asking for blood because a med evac came in and they didn't have any blood for the guy. Only people stationed on that PB could give blood because they were processed there. They had to shut all the ammenties down, such as showers, toilets, gym, hang out areas, etc. . . . and beg people because they wouldn't come, and they still had a hard time. People were not rushing to give their blood, or even showed they cared even an ounce for our brother's welfare who was in dire circumstances.

Thank you for your service? And that's not the only story I have, but it's the only one that made me find a spot nobody would see me (god bless IDF bunkers) and shed a few tears in anger, frustration, and sorrow.

I don't say these things to tell people not to thank service members and that it's not appreciated, but rather I hope that maybe a few people will become a bit more aware of the awkwardness it brings to some and the reality of the military, if even just a little.

As far as my personal response goes to being told thankyou for my service, I don't want it. I'll take it out of respect for the person giving it, but that's it. One of the major reasons I have served is for the people of my country. I went in without expecting anything in return. If they told me they weren't going to pay me I would have done it anyways. That said, if you are an American or an allied nation then I want to thank you, for being a citizen for me to protect. For working, producing, consuming, and being a human being and contributing to the furthering of the human race simply by just being alive. I hope one day our world can make due without people having to serve in a military, that the job I've done will no longer be needed. So again, thankyou, for living the dream, for living life, and being you.

 

[starburstfruitchews]

"Thankyou for your service"

I think there are certain careers that automatically get more respect and appreciation, especially amongst martial arts types who know a little of what goes into dealing with violence.
Armed forces, LEO, medics, nurses, doctors, teachers, etc.
People that have to deal with the worst that humanity can come up with.
Obviously there are idiots in all walks of life.
With the military it's often percieved (at least I percieve it) that because the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are not "popular" or generally accepted wars it can seem like the general populace aren't supporting the personel.
A little show of respect or thanks can show that while a person may not agree with the action they can at least admire and support the people making that action.

 

[red_cats_house]

"Thankyou for your service"

I agree very much, especially with your last comment. It doesn't matter if a service member believes in what he is doing or not, he has signed a contract to do it regardless as long as it is a lawful order (which is debatable being what your coofftopicnd is in certain cases, who are more then willing to do shady things to cover things up).

I feel that under those terms, that I am serving with something I do not agree on (the way we're going about it mostly) that I can accept a thankyou but that requires a little more then a handshake at the grocery store to have meaning.

 

[BeaverDivaSue]

"Thankyou for your service"

I respectfully submit that if the thanks is given with sincerity, it's valid. You cannot expect a civilian to know what you have experienced, but that doesn't mean they can't thank you. As for your response - that's entirely up to you. Bear in mind that most people will probably give more weight to a comment from a soldier than to a presidential address. So if you want to let them know what it is you really do, that's your chance.

Question: what would you like people to say? As you point out, they don't know anything about what you have actually done, or how you feel about it. "Thank you for your service" is a safe and polite option. Do you really want to sit down with each person and tell them what they are thanking you for?

 

[syierra]

"Thankyou for your service"

If I were capable of it then absolutely. I actually do it when provided the opportunity, but I make sure I am not easily identified as a person in the military when I'm out of uniform in order to avoid interactions with people because I can't tell them in a quick hello and it would be out of place.

What would I like? I would like the lies from the military to the civilian population to stop, and for it to present itself in a much better way then it does to help people understand better what actually goes on. Honesty and integrity is what I want, the very things the military loves to preach about. I think if we presented the truth, regardless of if it puts us in a good or bad light, that we can hold true to the standards we tell people we do.

As far as just saying thankyou for your service, I'm totally fine with it but I have my personal views on it.

 

[PrinceElectra]

"Thankyou for your service"

I have a slightly different question which is do you not like hearing thanks fullstop or is it just people you don't know actually walking up and saying it to your face? The latter I could see being annoying over time and a little awkward but I'm guilty of the former with things like wearing help for heroes clothing and a couple bits and bobs for my local regiment. Parades when they come back from service, a small bit of fundraising while they're deployed stuff like that.
It feels hard personally to knock people for doing any of that sort of stuff.

edit: By the way you mentioned that if someone says "thanks for your service" to anyone in uniform they might be saying it to someone who isn't in a combat role. If the thanks is due to respect for the military as a whole then so what? It's a sentiment usually reserved for people who do the actual fighting but I would struggle to think of other jobs that aren't important to allow the infantry to do their job in one way or another.

 

[KEEPON]

"Thankyou for your service"

To your first comment, thankyou very much for your commitment in supporting the troops. I'm not knocking you on it even though it may seem in a way that I am. I am appreciative of it. What I wish for, in essence, is a more informed thankyou for the troops. I want the public to know there are people who literally do nothing, that people who will never see combat in country because they are on a base miles away from anything with air craft and big weaponary protecting them, with all the ammenities of the states get paid the same ammount as the guy on deck hoping he doesn't blow up on his next foot step and then truly believe they are hardcore for being deployed and tell you about how hard it was. I want the public to know that people die, and die often by inferior leadership, people who came to "play soldier," and are not intelligent at all. I want people to know the lies they are told, what's really going on, how ineffective it all really is, and what different parts of the military actually do. I want them to know that there is a superfluous ammount of jobs that hinder proficiancy, waste resources, and actually screw over people who need to get things done.

I'm going to quit there, because that's just an inkling of a huge list.

I am greatful for the appreciation, as is any service member you will encounter unless they're a total idiot. It just saddens me that I know what they are thanking me for, and that they don't know, and I want them to know. It's more of a large scale media/government/politics thing then it is an individual thing so in no way am I knocking you personally. It's more of the higher end that enforces policy and keeps truth from getting out. I'm not saying there is some huge conspiracy, I honestly believe that some of it is done on purpose and some of it is done unknowlingy. Its high hopes of change for something that's not a priority in the big picture right now.

 

[limewirehelp21]

"Thankyou for your service"

Ah right. Would that be what I think are called the "REMF" people?



Very hard to argue against that from what the couple people I know who've served have told me


Heh fair enough. I wouldn't mind hearing more though, since I wanted to join I made an effort to try and understand what its all really like and I'm always up for hearing different people's thoughts. There seems to be those who loved it and recommend it and those who think the whole things the crappest decision they ever made with very little middle ground.
Then again the soldiers I know dress up every Wednesday night and go round a bunker shooting each other with bbs so maybe not the best group to ask


So is it just the failings and disorganisation you want people to truly understand better or the service as a whole? If I'm honest I think the vast majority of what you'll hear over here is stories about how crap the system is and how everyone's failing and not enough stories and footage from the frontline troops showing what war's actually like. But that's just me

I am trying really hard not to type things that come across as condescending or acting like I know better because I know you're in a much better position to know/understand these things more than I ever could but I've noticed I struggle to type what I mean clearly so sorry if anything is coming across badly.

 

[Tirzah]

"Thankyou for your service"

I do the exact same thing all the time. Been working on it though. I want you to know with me you have the benefit of a doubt that I do not believe you'll initially have any sort of or malicious intent towards me or anyone else (provided your rhetoric does not start with insults and is filled with hate) being that it is needed on a forum to get through a discussion and be productive about it, and if I find something a bit odd, offensive, or it makes me angry I'll state that it does and attempt to discuss it further. If you think something will be offensive, type away! Don't mind my feelings, I'm not worth all that.

Don't count your opinion out either. Your opinion is naturally shared by many others, so it definitely counts for something.

As far as you wanting information on the military and you're thinking on joining, feel free to ask me but I would rather that be a little more private through PM or email if you're interested. I have a very objective opinion in most cases regardless of how I'm coming off right now about the military. I'm aware my rhetoric is pretty strong, but I am capable of putting my feelings aside.

 

[loslieraneda]

"Thankyou for your service"

Of course you can't explain it to each person, which is why you're both limited to the brief/polite version. But regarding your other points, it seems your issue is more with the military/government that with the thanker.

 

[MissDee]

"Thankyou for your service"

Most definitely. It would be an unrealistic expecation to require every civilian who has a million other things on their mind and things to do to do their own personal research on the military to become more educated on it. However, exposure to it through media, politicians, and the actual military representing itself among many other things can make people more aware of what the reality of everything is in ways that don't require strenuous study by a civilian. That's why what I posted is simply "food for thought." I have no qualms with the person saying thankyou.

 

[skadanks]

"Thankyou for your service"

I just always tell them it's just another job and if I know what they do for a living I thank THEM for what they do. The people back at home taking care of my family and assisting them while I was gone? I'm the most grateful for that.

 

[waitingeeeee]

"Thankyou for your service"

I'm nice to anyone who 'serves' be it the soldier or the waitor giving me dinner. They all serving the public in some way, and they don't have to serve me (unless said soldier is conscripted) but they doing a nice thing and so I am always friendly.

 

[youraliashere]

"Thankyou for your service"

I don't think people need to understand the details of military life to thank you for being willing to engage in it. There are many of us who are unable or unwilling to serve in the military. And the self-aware ones know that we garner the benefits of having a military anyway. I don't think a "thank you" (even an ill-informed one) is out of place.

It's fine to feel a bit awkward about being thanked. But this isn't really a question of the general populace changing its behaviour. We know what we're told. We can't all have first-hand experience, which basically leaves a binary choice: 1) Respond based on what we DO know (which results in ill-informed "thank yous" or 2) just don't thank people who serve.

To me, that second one is a bigger misstep than the first.

 

[Moroccangirl]

"Thankyou for your service"

Ero-Sennin, I think I have an idea of what you are going on about. Even though I was an REMF and never served in Nam. I think some of it is an issue with the Corps as much as anything. I went in the Corps because they presented them as an elite, an organization where a private is as important as a major. Where honor and duty were ideals and standards that all strive for.

What I found was hypocrisy, deceit, people putting chance for promotion over the welfare of the Marines who served under them, entitlement and an old boy network that had nothing to do with competence. I also meet some very good Marines to whom honor and duty really meant something. The shame was they were a small minority. I had a friend spend 30 days in the brig for playing the Marine Corps hymn in a disrespectful manner on his harmonica. There were people who were in charge of air units with awesome destructive capabilities that I wouldn't trust running a 7-11.

I am very proud of having been a Marine, of making it through Marine boot camp but my experiences of what I found out in the wing left me with a bitter taste in my mouth.

This was during the early 70's when Viet-Nam was coming to a close and the Marine Corps was in a shambles. I heard the official stories of how the Corps has done away with all of those issues from the bad days but I took it with a grain of salt. These unhealthy behaviors were too institutionalized to be removed with things as simple as directives from the Coofftopicndant of the Marine Corps.

Just my 2 cents.

Edit: Wow, I didn't realize that I was still so bitter over this. Thanks for letting me share.