You know when you go through airport security, and they're all, "Put everything in the plastic tub, sir...SIR. I said EVERYTHING. YES, that includes that priceless pocket watch that belonged to your great-grandfather. What is that, anyway? A Breguet No. 5 housed in 18-karat yellow gold etched with a barleycorn guilloché motif? Yeah. That's what I thought. Real pretty piece o' clockwork you got there, buddy. Now put the damn watch in the tub before I call over Big Bob and his box of surgical gloves. You're holding up the line." More »
