My grandmothers deathwish is for me to get baptized. I love her, and I respect her. But it's not for me. I would be disrespecting the ritual and myself. It would be literal blasphemy.
But my dad who does not yet know about the refusal read the first draft of my college essay, where I referenced it. He's furious. My family is painting me as the black sheep, telling me I'm horrible, accusing me of hating her, I'm selfish, disrespectful, and the list goes on and on. NO ONE is on my side, and I just feel constantly attacked. They keep contacting all the friends outside of the family and telling them there side of the story.
People keep walking up to me and pleading with me to give her this one last gift.
But it's my life. My spirituality.
If I decided to believe later, I wouldn't want my baptism to be from when I was a non believer. It would feel like I had insulted my own religion. And I know no matter what I believe later in life I'll regret giving in.
Help? I really need advice?
But my dad who does not yet know about the refusal read the first draft of my college essay, where I referenced it. He's furious. My family is painting me as the black sheep, telling me I'm horrible, accusing me of hating her, I'm selfish, disrespectful, and the list goes on and on. NO ONE is on my side, and I just feel constantly attacked. They keep contacting all the friends outside of the family and telling them there side of the story.
People keep walking up to me and pleading with me to give her this one last gift.
But it's my life. My spirituality.
If I decided to believe later, I wouldn't want my baptism to be from when I was a non believer. It would feel like I had insulted my own religion. And I know no matter what I believe later in life I'll regret giving in.
Help? I really need advice?