I, too, was told that I was not pretty or smart enough. If I was not being laugh at at home, there was school to complete that cycle of abuse that I endure. how I made it to be over 30 years old is beyond me. But, I know how you feel. my mom has died over three years ago and none of the siblings talks to me. I only have a 92 year old aunt who I see once a week and a 60+ year old cousin who calls me twice a week. That's all. Everyone else could care less. So you know what, screw them! My family consists of the two I just named and the amount of friends I have made over the years. I love my family, don't get me wrong but, you have to face it this way, why bother with people who do not want to be bothered with you? You have a great fiance' and two great kids. Your family should be those three and the friends in your life that makes you smile, calls you and keeps you in mind. There is nothing wrong with you. When they ask about your family, your fiance' and your kids are, aren't they? Why worry about anyone else? I hope this helps. Grant it, you can get therapy, but if you can't afford it, know this. I understand what you are going through, because I Have gone through this. But, you know what? I turned out better than what they thought I would.