I am 16 a junior in high school oh boy where to start okay i am depressed for so many reasons.
First off i don't feel like i have any friends i literally sit at home all the time and do nothing but electronics. I have social problems because i isolate myself and cant talk to people, i am so awkward around people and no one wants to be around me or no one likes me because of it. I have never had a girlfriend or never talk to girls or have had any romantic experience what so ever with a girl besides a kiss in first grade. I liked a girl last year and never even talked to her and it stressed me out so much.
I really want a girlfriend but i am too scared and awkward talk to girls and to have a gf. I have no self esteem i constantly hear people say how bad looking i am. And honestly i believe it i look in the mirror and i don't like what i see. I just see a scrawny kid with a red acne ridden face which i have to go on medication its so bad. Adults say the medication is working and my face looks better but i am not happy with the way it looks because people from my school say i look ugly anyway. No one makes me feel good everyone makes me feel like crap. No one ever gives me compliments on purpose they only do it when they see me upset or something. This is not me!!! When i was a kid i didn't have self esteem problems, everyday i would hang out with friends and people from my neighborhood, people liked me, i had fun all the time, i wasn't awkward at all. Now i am just at the lowest of lowest.
I hate my life, i think about suicide honestly. I would never do it because i am religious and believe it is a sin and am too scared to do it. I go see a school councilor and i never fully explain all my issues to her because i have really bad add and forget in the moment what i want to say. Same with the therapist i am seeing who doesn't even help me he just gives me mental tips on how to approach certain situations which is not the right way to help me.
I need to be getting advice on how to change my life not to remind myself i am good looking. I really really want a girlfriend so badly and i only feel rejected. I don't dress well and apparently in my high school that is a turnoff. Literally it seems no girls even like me or are interested. Today this one girl who i thought was interested in me a avoided even walking down the same hall as me. I feel so ugly and disgusting and ashamed.
First off i don't feel like i have any friends i literally sit at home all the time and do nothing but electronics. I have social problems because i isolate myself and cant talk to people, i am so awkward around people and no one wants to be around me or no one likes me because of it. I have never had a girlfriend or never talk to girls or have had any romantic experience what so ever with a girl besides a kiss in first grade. I liked a girl last year and never even talked to her and it stressed me out so much.
I really want a girlfriend but i am too scared and awkward talk to girls and to have a gf. I have no self esteem i constantly hear people say how bad looking i am. And honestly i believe it i look in the mirror and i don't like what i see. I just see a scrawny kid with a red acne ridden face which i have to go on medication its so bad. Adults say the medication is working and my face looks better but i am not happy with the way it looks because people from my school say i look ugly anyway. No one makes me feel good everyone makes me feel like crap. No one ever gives me compliments on purpose they only do it when they see me upset or something. This is not me!!! When i was a kid i didn't have self esteem problems, everyday i would hang out with friends and people from my neighborhood, people liked me, i had fun all the time, i wasn't awkward at all. Now i am just at the lowest of lowest.
I hate my life, i think about suicide honestly. I would never do it because i am religious and believe it is a sin and am too scared to do it. I go see a school councilor and i never fully explain all my issues to her because i have really bad add and forget in the moment what i want to say. Same with the therapist i am seeing who doesn't even help me he just gives me mental tips on how to approach certain situations which is not the right way to help me.
I need to be getting advice on how to change my life not to remind myself i am good looking. I really really want a girlfriend so badly and i only feel rejected. I don't dress well and apparently in my high school that is a turnoff. Literally it seems no girls even like me or are interested. Today this one girl who i thought was interested in me a avoided even walking down the same hall as me. I feel so ugly and disgusting and ashamed.