I'm a Christian & i feel really guilty for messing around with my new bf...

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Honey1

Member
...a little while ago..? We are moving way too fast. i've been his gf for about a day, we've gone out together about 5 times. we've obviously kissed. but the other night he sucked on my nipples. and he did again tonight, he fingered me, and i jacked him off. I feel horrible =( i feel like just crying. i dont wanna be stupid and screw up again and get myself hurt so bad again & have sex before marriage again...even though i already have screwed up, i dont wanna have sex and im afraid that one day im not gonna be able to control myself and lose my mind! please help me...i dont know what to do. please give me advice and way to control myself and how we can stay away from temptation. thanks.
cause i always have sex with the wrong guy and end up getting used and played. i get attached and screwed over.
I feel guilty because i just do. i feel that its wayyyyyy too soon and im gonna end up getting hurt if i dont control myself.
 
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MikeG1

Member
First of all you might want to ask the question: "Am I really a Christian"?
You say you don't want to do these things but be honest with yourself, you do want to do them and you are! I don't know how old you are but you need to set a rule, kissing and nothing more PERIOD! If he can't handle it dump him if you can't stick to it perhaps your not really a Christian after all, Jesus say he who loves me keeps my commandments.
Repent and turn from your sin, then read 1 John 2:3-6. John says if you do not keep His commandments then you do not know the Lord, if you say you do you are a liar and the truth is not in you.
God loves you my dear and these may seem like harsh words but Hell is much more harsh and it is the truth and the truth alone that can set you free.
-Be strong in the LORD and in the strength of His might
 
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SecularPenguinist

New member
Go with your instincts. Don't do anything that you don't feel comfortable with.

Leave "god" out of the equation however.
Mythical beings have no business dictating our actions.
 
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Frankie

Member
God made human beings higher than animals. We do not lively purely by instinct. You are capable of controlling yourself and so is he. You should discuss this with him and make rules regarding your relationship. If he is not a Christian he will not understand or like that. However, if he is not a Christian you should not be his girlfriend. "Be ye not unequally yoked with unbelievers". If he is a Christian he should not expect this from you until you are married. He should respect your wishes and both of you should respect Gods laws.
 
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Jose

Member
An authoritative answer to these questions can come only from our Creator—Jehovah God. And in his Word he tells us to “flee from fornication.” (1 Corinthians 6:18) Just what does that mean? The Greek word translated “fornication” is not restricted to sexual intercourse but includes a variety of lewd acts. So if two unmarried people engage in oral sex or in fondling each others’ reproductive organs, they are guilty of fornication.

But could they still be considered virgins—that is, in God’s eyes? In the Bible the word “virgin” is used as a symbol of moral purity. (2 Corinthians 11:2-6) But it is also used in a physical sense. The Bible tells of a young woman named Rebekah. It says that she was “a virgin, and no man had had sexual intercourse with her.” (Genesis 24:16) Interestingly, in the original Hebrew, the word for “intercourse” evidently included other acts besides normal man/woman intercourse. (Genesis 19:5) So, according to the Bible, if a youth engaged in any form of fornication, he or she could hardly be considered a virgin.

The Bible exhorts Christians to flee not only from fornication itself but also from all forms of unclean conduct that could lead to it.# (Colossians 3:5) Others may ridicule you for taking such a stand. “‘You don’t know what you’re missing!’ is what I heard all through high school,” says a Christian youth named Kelly. However, premarital sex is nothing more than the “temporary enjoyment of sin.” (Hebrews 11:25) It can cause lasting physical, emotional, and spiritual harm.
 
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momms

New member
What is it with you Christians and posting your sexual exploits?

Either accept the fact you did nothing wrong (Sex is not evil and your guilt is very misplaced) AND/OR don't do anything you don't feel comfortable with doing again.

Edit: Honey, YOU do have control over your own actions you know. Use some self-discipline. And the very nature of love is to grieve and hurt when it is over, that's just life and everyone goes through that. You live and you learn; and you make better choices in mates in the future, it is that simple.
 
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Tito360

New member
I'm sorry if he was a real man, he would have said to you like "Hey let both of us take it easy" or" Hey if you do not feel uncomfortable about this, please let me know & I know what no means". I am very sorry to say this but, YOU CHOOSE HIM to be your man & is your responsibility. If you are not happy of your relationship with that boy, then you should end the relationship & tell him the truth. It will be hard if you both of you guys become friends. Good luck!

-One of the good guys.
 
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mmmmm

Member
wow... n that's what miss-guided religion does to ppl... sex is a human basic need and there's nothing wrong about it... it's better that you get some condoms so that when u cave in to ur insticts u don't get pregnant...

Religion is only good for u when it makes you happy, when it helps you be a better person... it doesn't work for me and sounds like it's not really working for u that much... so u might wanna reevaluate your conditioning...
 
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goat

New member
Or how bout you say screw religion. Religion is just a form of mind control that brainwashes people into thinking they are doing something bad when they are really not.
 
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Labgrrl

New member
Just either control yourself or do not.

Honestly, what do Christians teach their kids? You are not an animal, you have control over what is going on here. If you want to control yourself, then do so.
 
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mer

New member
I don't know if you're feeling bad because of your personal views, or because of your religious beliefs. Either way you should only do what you feel comfortable with. If you feel comfortable "screwing up" then go ahead, otherwise tell your boyfriend about your concerns and try to work out a solution. Hope it works out for you guys.
 
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