Is this a poem... or a rant? Indictment by the prosecution..c/c?

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Fredric

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Why, Do we lament, over earth coldly fought ?
Our years of existence,gives us what was sought
A world we conquered,we stole all we could
All, that has existed or ever would

Long roads traveled,collide with purer thoughts
Wars we've started,accomplished what's been taught
Dried blood on cold hands, will weep for us not
We deserve this hell,peace is crushed when sought

The traveled roads are lined,with standing stones
Tombs for the many,from the marches home
Bones are still broken under tight laced boots
Dare we look back to dead cities we loot

Humanity will die ,drawn knives our fate
Slice human ages, leave us at hell's gate
We of nature's making, we'll still be here
Armed for more taking, it's us, that we fear
Nancy you are correct, this is an old poem, let's me see how far
I've come...good observation
 
Hi. Deep meaningful message, inspiring , and insightful. Humanity is unregenerable and hates the language of conformity, since conformity has a whiff of the inhuman about it . Thanks for sharing i enjoyed you poem. T.C
 
I believe it is technically a rant-full poem of great worth that has packed more punch because of your uncanny ability to rhyme well when writing on difficult topics. I for one, find it "AUDIBLE".
 
It is definitely a poem but this reader finds it a bit stiff,
I would like to see you loosen your grasp on it's neck
and sing it rather than making it rhyme
I do not care what tune you choose but I really think you can write better.
 
I assume this poem is an answer to my desire to have a whole peaceful nation. but as you said it seems impossible and unfortunately, I agree with dying humanity. very well written.
 
Subtle ranting supervised by poetic license.

The second stanza was my favorite. Made me think, line by line,
"everyone's born as a good person with a clean conscious"
"then, when they think back, somehow the start of a journey has become the start of a battle"
"everyone acting out a cruelty - an insult to their own innocent pasts"
"we're all mortal heroes. our consciences defining our surroundings"

I probably shouldn't paraphrase. That part just really stood out and made me think.
Thanks.
 
New or old your poem still carries the message of peace and the tears of war- I love love love the line
"Dried blood on cold hands, will weep for us not" You make me want to write sonnets with passion-
 
A good poem,Concise,rhymes and not empty thoughts.
It's great when a poem can be read and understood by most people.
The ending is fantastic,proving most humans are fools.
An 8...near great....bye
 
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