I am 17 years old and have dealt with anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts for four years without medication. I am on medication now which is Ativan and I take 0.5 mg a day. I've been taking it for two months now. Although I still feel stressed. I don't know what's going on with my heart but it feels like it's going to stop now and it's struggling. I get night time anxiety I think (only happens most at night time), and a few months ago I noticed I couldn't really feel my heart beating and I made it go faster til I could feel my whole body pulsating. (it's been that way for four years also, my heart has always beat fast and hard but now it doesn't and I'm freaked out). I have a high heart rate even when resting (in the 100's usually) and low blood pressure. I don't know what this means. Im not active and it's only feeling like its going to stop when resting most of the time. I lost my grandma about a year ago to heart failure and then I lost my god mother after to a heart anyrusim, then my friend who died recently (Courtney Nash, the girl who died from a brain amoeba, it was all over the news nationwide) and I've been scarred and depressed ever since. I do go to a therapist but not often. All I'm asking is, can non stop stress and depression make you feel like your body is going to shut down and just stop working? Because I just feel so exhausted. Mentally and physically. I also have abnormal breathing patterns because of anxiety (always tense and expecting something bad to happen). Should I go to the dr? I've been and he said I was healthy :/ but I think there's something wrong with my heart. I just feel like I'm dying and I cry everyday and I usually cannot sleep. Someone help me please? Am I going to be okay? It's 4 am. I have no one to talk to.