CristaBloom
New member
- Feb 7, 2011
- 0
- 0
- 0
It's a paragraph from my novel 
well my first novel well is it ok? does it sound retarded? pls tell me! thanks alot
My sister Jane gave me her hand then we walked unto the middle of the room then started to dance. Lady Mary and Lord Philippe was behind me and my sister Jane. As all the partners moved sidewards and turned around I kept gazing at Lady Mary, for one second I thought that Philippe was right.. she is beautiful, but then when I come back to my senses I would tell my self that, I am Edmund Seymour I cannot fall in love with a woman like her! and then I would come back to admiring her beauty
well my first novel well is it ok? does it sound retarded? pls tell me! thanks alotMy sister Jane gave me her hand then we walked unto the middle of the room then started to dance. Lady Mary and Lord Philippe was behind me and my sister Jane. As all the partners moved sidewards and turned around I kept gazing at Lady Mary, for one second I thought that Philippe was right.. she is beautiful, but then when I come back to my senses I would tell my self that, I am Edmund Seymour I cannot fall in love with a woman like her! and then I would come back to admiring her beauty