Is this situation funny or is it ironic? I don't know whether to laugh or feel

OddlyEnough

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insulted? My son’s wife wouldn’t let me be part of family Thanksgiving or upcoming Christmas, and wouldn’t tell me why. The grandchildren beg to see me, but she gets mad even when my son calls me. I spent Thanksgiving alone, and knew it was coming so I volunteered to deliver hot Thanksgiving meals to 4 shut-ins in the community (I live 4 hours from the rest of my family/ my son wanted me to move back but then this happened and I remembered why I moved away). I sat and talked with each shut-in for about 1.5 hours each which helped me realize others are lonely too.
My ex called to see how I was doing, which I suppose they thought (and gloted over) I was depressed (which I am at times because I miss my grandchildren and son’s family). I told him not to feel bad, that I am fine. He insisted I come visit him, so I told him no, I kept busy by volunteering. His response was “I should do that! That’s what I’m going to do for Christmas.”

Its been two weeks and finally my DIL’s mom wrote me a letter telling me that she and her husband are volunteering to deliver food to the poor. My ex’s sister-in-law is my son’s MIL’s best friend. She presented this to me in such a way that made me feel this may be a competition. Both she and my DIl state that I am always topping them, which is not true- I try to find common ground to fit in and that pisses everyone off.

I wrote back that I admire how giving and involved she and her husband are. I did not respond with what I did, because I think it would cause other mixed emotions. They do make me feel that everything I do harms their family and me being eliminated is some kind of a prize.
I wish I had not told my ex that I volunteered, but on the other hand, its getting all of us out of my son & DIL’s hair so they can gain control of their family—the new competition is who can act more selfless.
I am still depressed, but something in this situation is humorous.
 
Get off the merry go round and don't play their game. Tell your son and DIL that you are there for them if they need you. If they don't call move on. The best thing you can do with ex-spouses and their family is to move on especially if you don't have any minor children. Enjoy your life, volunteer, and make new friends. BS like this isn't worth the hassle. Look for singles groups, church groups, or other functions where there are people who share your interests. Don't cling to the past. You are only alone if you want to be.
 
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