My mum makes my uncle and aunt food because they are housebound but he

bee1

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complained its...? he complained that its not cooked properly. Last week he got angry because we couldn't deliver the food in the afternoon so we delivered it in the morning instead because we had to send our car to the garage. Sometimes he also asks my mum to make food for his 32 year old daughter and her 3 kids for when they come over. I told my mum to stop cooking for him because he is taking advantage but she doesn't know how to say "no". She has been doing it for 4 years because she wanted to help out to reduce the stress for my uncle as he is obese and has a wife to care for who has never left the house once (except for hospital visits) in 15 years.
She only goes once a week and she gives them a bunch of food for the week.
 
If there are 2 adults in the house then someone should be able to cook. Tell your mom to stop making them food, go food shopping drop it off then tell them here you go. Or even better buy the frozen meals for him and ask do you like these better. The only way he will change and be nicer about it is if your mom stops doing everything for him. Over 4 years he has gotten used to it, it is time for your mom to cut the cord at least until he is a little bit more grateful for what she does for him.
 
I think your Mum needs to regain her independence and start to stand up for herself. There are other home help services available. Maybe she could start by reducing the number of times she cooks for them?
Also she could just make them batches of food for your uncle to freeze. Things like shepherds pie and lasagne are easy to put into freezable portions and then all your aunt and uncle have to do is put them in the microwave. That way she could cut the times that she cooks for him in half!
Tell her she needs to stand up for herself.
 
Your uncle is taking advantage of you mothers generosity in a big way...sadly there is nothing you can do , if you mother is not prepared to tell him enough is enough. You could try talking to her again ...tell her maybe it's time she started to look after herself..because it seems this uncle doesn't care about her..if he did he would not treat her like this.
 
Surely the 32 year old daughter should be caring for her parents-not your mother.
If he is obese then he should be in some sort of programme ordered by the GP.
If your uncle doesn't like what your mum does suggest he makes his own arrangements-if he is obese he really should be in a structured programme with health professionals.
This is not your mothers problem-nor yours.
This is a problem for the medical profession.
Can't you get them assessed ?
 
i am afraid i would have to put him in his place, buy him the food, dump it on the doorstep and say, here you go, if you can do better than you do it, even better ask your 32yr old daughter to have a go, when they get hungry they will attempt it or phone your mom and grovel for her to do it again, and if he is obese then it wont hurt him
 
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