parents and non parents.

Blade...given your views on child behaviour I assume that you are the best student of Karate ever and can learn a kata perfectly the first time you are shown it?
And then never mess it up or make a mistake ever again?
And I also assume that as a child you did everything your parents told you to do the very second your were told it and never questioned any instruction?
I also assume you never got tired or grumpy or annoyed or worried or nervous or embarassed as a child?
Just a flat unemotional automata that followed orders?

Because that seems to be what you expect from children.
And as any parent will tell you (because they understand children better than you do) that's an unrealistic expectation.

Children are not prograofftopicble computers and moulding their behavior into acceptable adult behaviour is an ongoing process. There are mistakes and mishaps and even just flat out defiance for the sake of testing the limits.
They get tired and frustrated just like everyone else. They are developing their own sense of self and will question everything (it's annoying but that's how they learn).
You seem to ascribe every bit of unacceptable kiddie behaviour as down to bad parenting.
But that's not the case. It's true of a lot of cases for sure but not all.
All kids behave "badly" at some point in their lives and I'd be worried if they didn't.
 
I should have known you'd go this route. Earning a belt takes very little skill compared with learning to raise a child. Procreation is the tiniest fraction of parenting.

I have a black belt and four years at home as a stay-at-home dad. Three guesses (with two possibilities) which one takes more hard work, training, ability, and intelligence.

The fact that you could even suggest for a moment that biology pretty much handles it dismantles your theory that you, as a nonparent, understand what it's like.

Also, "a meathead could do it" is a pretty good suofftopicrization of what I was saying earlier about your consistent mischaracterization.

As for your belt ranking, of course it would be accurately true to say millions of people have earned one. That's not the point. We're a community. We support one another. MAP was joined in congratulating you because it was presumably important to you. We wanted to celebrate YOUR achievement. How it compared to other people's achievements was irrelevant at that time.

Belt tests take skill. Parenting doesn't. Bloody nora.
 
Only my point still stands.

I am sorry you didnt read what I said. Becoming a parent takes no skill or intelligence.

Raising a good human being does. Especially on this crazy planet where, I swear, more than half the human population are meatheads.

and pasmith, I was a real brat as a child. Maybe possibly because I was abused starting when I was young. I was always being mistreated by someone.

I have a cousin who was an animal and people abuser as a child. He now has a son thats just like him. the 4 year old is a total brat who doesnt do what he is told. an d screams and whines and has tantrums. and his mother gives him whatever he screams for. And when she puts him in time out, and leaves, he just comes out right after her.

I always thought, both humans and animals are brats, and the only reason why some are not, is because they have to be taught out of it.

I got a 24 year old cousin who still does whatever she like to and in her grandparents home, because she was never taught proper behavior.

I do not believe humans are "naturally good" Naturally good my gout ridden foot.

as for did I have a dog. Yes.

what did I do with her mess. Nothing. She went outside to do it.

Litter boxes? My cat goes outside. We do however keep one for snowstorms and things like that. or if she gets sick (she hasnt yet and she is almost 11 years old) Otherwise, it stays out in the garage.
 
I think it depends on whether you class a parent as a mother or father that cares and looks after a child or simply the provider of the necessary equipment to produce one. Personally I think a parent is more than that but that is just my opinion
 
now you're on to insulting 3.5 billion people, instead of just parents? blade, you're better than this.
 
I think they're just naturally contrary! I like kids but I have no idea what to do with them. They do seem to like me though - maybe they can sense that I'm a little bemused but not dangerous. I'm happy to clown about with them for a while, but young kids have an amazing capacity for repeating a game until you're bored senseless.
 
So you're talking about the mere act of conceiving a child then? Well, that's just ridiculous. First, nobody was congratulating him on fertilizing an egg. They were congratulating him, in advance, on what we know is going to be a lifetime of trials, tribulations, and triumphs. I thought that would be fairly obvious.

Second, it's not nearly as simple as you imagine. Animals give birth without much fanfare. Humans, not content with the mortality rate amongst infants in the animal kingdom, go to far greater pains. It's unbelievably difficult on the mother, physically, emotionally, and mentally. And, more unbelievably (given how easy it apparently is), it's spawned an entire speciality of highly trained medical professionals.

I have a coworker right now who gave birth early. Her child was TWO POUNDS. Happily, they're at one of the best Neonatal Intensive Care Units in the region, and the baby is slowly making progress. When the baby reaches a weight that's self-sustaining, I will breath a huge sigh of relief.

In the meantime, the parents have rented an apartment closer to the hospital. (A hospital far from where they live, but it has the best reputation for neonatal care) So the father can still see the baby despite having to return to work to keep them solvent.

That sound easy to you?
 
That's not a total brat.
All kids display that behaviour to some degree.
I'd consider my wife and I to be pretty good parents and my daughter to be a pretty special little child (I would say that wouldn't I?!).
She still does all that from time to time and on occasion is even "that" child in the supermarket or restaurant playing up.
If that bothers you then unlucky...you might as well complain when it rains because that's just life.

BUT...I take your point on how parents respond to that behaviour.
BUT...parents are also annoyed by other parents that don't sort their kids out just like you are. Idiot "parents" with kids that don't know limits (for the most part) annoy everyone except themselves.
We went for our 20 week scan on Tuesday. We left our daughter at home with a baby sitter because we knew we'd want to give attention to the process, talk to doctors/widwife etc.
Another couple brought their 4 year old and the woman's Mum with them. The kid was whining the whole time. Just repetitive "I'm ready to go..I'm ready to go" because he didn't want to be there and was bored.
But damn it was annoying. And I like kids.
But all his parents did was comfort him and try to placate him.
With my daughter we would have provided some colouring or some books, then tried placating, then asked her to stop whining, then told her to stop whining because life is boring sometimes and finally I would have taken her out to sit in the car.
But I didn't think less of the kid for whining or end up hating kids as a group.
 
Yes, so don't tell me I dont or will never understand, because its not rocket science to just bring something with you for the kid to do. Yet people with kids will say we cant understand. Yes we do. Sometimes better than this parent you were talking about, obviously.

by the way.

wow, I am soooo different. When its a human baby, I'm like, I wanna stay away from it. Get the drooly being away from me kinda thing. But I love animal babies and plant babies. Same with me and insects. I love insects. My family would tell ya how I hold them and it doesnt bother me. Bees, wasps, european earwigs, spiders, you name it. But, I'll run like heck if a spiderweb touches me. I dont understand it. I like what most people dont like, and I dont like, what most people like. Yes, I am weird. And different. But, its me.
 
So would I be right in assuming the congratualtions isn't for just having a child, but like a pre assumption that you feel the person will be a good parent?
 
I'd say so, yeah. Though just having the baby successfully delivered is still worthy of good will.

It's odd to try and explain this because it seems so self-evident to me. When someone has a birthday themselves, MAP members wish them a happy birthday. Simply for not dying in the space of a year. Is the word "congratulations" the difference? (I'm not trying to be snarky there. I'm genuinely wondering whether it's the semantics of congratulating someone for something that--in some opinions--isn't an achievement.)

I think, in this case "congratulations" is also a form of encouragement. It's really hard work. I can barely see straight right now, after 5 weeks without more than 2 straight hours of sleep. Sometimes what gets you through a really pretty unbelievably stressful time is the idea that others out there get it and have been there. And that's coming from someone who's been there twice already myself.
 
That takes skill and intelligence many times on the part of the docs who have to deal with it if something goes wrong.



another reason I PURR - fer kittens.
 
Okay, quick quiz:

What does an expecting mother need to do to best ensure the health of her newborn and herself?
 
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