Why do you feel you're a slave and a robot? You have complete freedom to disbelieve anything you like, anywhere, anytime. Nobody can force you to believe. If you are a slave, it is by your own choice. And nobody is a robot unless they are addicted to some sort of narcotics.
Perhaps you could talk with a professional, because it sounds as if you might be depressed about your life choices.
Your logical mind can tell you what your ears wanna hear.
You are not permitted to attend church or believe in anything. It mgiht seem as if things in this country are pressuring you, but the U.S. Constitution does state everyone has freedom of choice when it comes to religion.
So, just ignore the outside and listen to your inside.
There are communities and intelligent people all over the world with whom you can connect. But it will be difficult to stay unaffected by religious influenced culture. Unfortunately most societies respect and admire abstract concepts of semi parents and icons than appreciate real life like people and living beeings.