Would/do you take vacations without your kids (teens and younger)?

[mtgcnv67]

My mom went to Las Vegas, Monterey, London, and France (those are just a few) places when I was a kid and left my brother and I home with my grandparents. As I got older (teens), I resented her more and more for taking trips to places like London, where I said many times that I wanted to go. Even when I was 16, I could understand why taking an 8 year old to London would be pointless, but a 16 year old could appreciate it so much more.

Now, at 26 and with a baby of my own, I hear stories from my husband and In-laws about all the trips my in-laws took on cruises, the Caribbean and so forth without their kids (as kids and teens, forget about now).

Again, I can understand how it would be a waste of money to pay for kids to go on some trips that they won't remember or appreciate, but overall, I'm just afraid i'll feel too guilty if I did it to my kids. Remembering how much I still resent my mom for leaving me behind on her trips; I don't want my kids resenting me. I'm not trying to be "the cool mom" or anything special; I have every intention of disciplining and raising my kids to hopefully be respectful and responsible adults. I don't want to spoil them, but I also want to give them some fun experiences and memories like I hear from my husband. At the same time, I also want to be able to have a bit of one-on-one, alone time with my husband, and maybe a trip to Vegas or Hawaii without the kids at some point in the next 20 years...I just can't help but think of my feelings towards my mom's action and feel guilty at the thought of doing that to them.

Would you take a trip without your kids?

 

[annmoreno62]

Because you felt the way you do I say always give them the option unless its vegas or reno where kids are gunna be totally bored. Try doing family trips instead because when there 18 there not gunna wanna do the family trip thing. YOU got 18 years of mandatory family time take advantage because 18 comes too soon. Make these years count build many many memories video them enjoy the simple things in life. Best of Luck!

 

[Rocky74]

I'm assuming that you meant that your in-laws went on the vacations WITH their kids, right? I say DEFINITELY take the kids on some of your trips... not all, but just do it and see how it goes. As you said, have some trips that are "adult time" with just your husband, but you will not regret taking family trips.

My parents believed in taking us on trips with them. It was always educational, and it gave us really good bonding time together. We got to go some amazing places: Israel, Mexico, Venezuela, Florida, Jamaica, upstate NY, and a cruise to various islands. My parents also invited me on their trip to Spain and Portugal that they were going to take alone because they felt sorry for me as I was on summer break from college and couldn't get a decent summer job. My parents are now gone, but these family vacations are the most treasured memories that I have of them, because it was the only block of time that my dad wasn't stuck in the office and my mom wasn't working and overloaded with housework. It was a lot of fun and we got to meet new people, see places I haven't been able to afford on my own since, learn some languages, and really appreciate what we have at home. I have photos and souvenirs and a few videos, and they're just amazing to have.

My mom always used to point out that we were especially lucky because most people they knew left their kids at home, but my parents weren't about that at all. When we did go away, there were always other kids there to meet, so obviously we weren't the only ones who were away on family trips.

My parents also had plenty of trips just the two of them, to work-related conventions and just vacations when they got older. There was plenty of time for them to do that later in life, but I think they missed the family trips, also. Just do it!

 

[Yvonne]

The only "trips" I ever took without my kids were one, a week across state taking care of my mom when she was very sick and two, a two day honeymoon the weekend my husband and I got married. (My son is from a previous relationship and we got married after our daughter was born.)

I honestly don't see any joy in taking trips like that without my kids. I would miss them the entire time and wonder how much fun they'd be having if they were with us. My husband still remembers all the times he spent at his grandparent's house growing up because his mom was out on trips, dates with various men, etc. and I see what it did to him. The one good thing about that was he knew he would eat, since his mom has fur coats but no food in the fridge.

Anyways, I don't see the problem in general with taking a trip once a year or something without the kids. If you have close friends/family willing to watch them and you're comfortable with it...whatever. It's just not for me.

 

[Cheshire]

Not unless I had no choice. My husband is about to take a job in Norway, flights to Oslo from London are really cheap and it's mid-winter. You can bet I am going for a few days, before he starts working. BUT I will not take my oldest two, only the two year old. I would love to but if you take them out of school in the middle of the year, without good reason you get fined. So they will be staying with grandma.

As for your mother not taking you, believe me, there is loads for an 8 year old in London, it would be the experience of lifetime. My husband had a contract a couple of summers ago in Utah, we took our three children to spend the summer there and my son of 8, who was 6 at the time still talks about Utah with fond memories.

When my oldest was a baby, we took him everywhere my husband was working. While he doesn't remember the trips, he is an adaptable child. All the travelling made him the easy going little boy he is today. He can go anywhere, sleep anywhere and eat anything. There are benefits, even if they don't remember the places.