I have a major issue with my appearance. I am six-two or -three, broad shouldered, bald, about 250 lbs...and I hate it. I am immune to comments that some females are into big bald guys because I don’t want to be seen that way...hell, Kate Winslet could tell me she thinks I’m hot and Id still feel bad.
What I really want is to be very thin, like 100 lbs thinner. Ideally, I want to have a flat chest, narrow shoulders, and de-emphasize my size. Don’t ask me why...that is irrelevant...what is relevant is this is what I want. I don’t look at big muscular guys and get jealous, but I do get jealous when I see someone small-boned and thin and tiny.
One side of me thinks I will never be satisfied until I get to where I want to be (very thin), but another (perhaps more rational) side looks in the mirror and doesn’t think it is possible. That makes me angry and depressed and makes me feel that I will never feel attractive.
I am posting pics just to give you an idea of my size now. I don’t need or want remarks that I look fine the way I am, and if you tell me to work on my inner beauty and to learn to love myself, I wont listen to you, so don’t bother. I don’t need a pep talk or a compliment...I just want peoples take on my situation.
http://s385.photobucket.com/albums/oo296/curseofdolkite/
What I really want is to be very thin, like 100 lbs thinner. Ideally, I want to have a flat chest, narrow shoulders, and de-emphasize my size. Don’t ask me why...that is irrelevant...what is relevant is this is what I want. I don’t look at big muscular guys and get jealous, but I do get jealous when I see someone small-boned and thin and tiny.
One side of me thinks I will never be satisfied until I get to where I want to be (very thin), but another (perhaps more rational) side looks in the mirror and doesn’t think it is possible. That makes me angry and depressed and makes me feel that I will never feel attractive.
I am posting pics just to give you an idea of my size now. I don’t need or want remarks that I look fine the way I am, and if you tell me to work on my inner beauty and to learn to love myself, I wont listen to you, so don’t bother. I don’t need a pep talk or a compliment...I just want peoples take on my situation.
http://s385.photobucket.com/albums/oo296/curseofdolkite/