Do you like this for my eHarmony profile? Just in case things with spitty

M

MariahThomson

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don't work out.? I am sooo adorable. I am a freakin’ Adonis, a good kisser, and am superior to Brad Pitt in so many ways, including my ability to open bags of Doritos. I have no social diseases, am incensed by giraffes, and can spell pretty well. I know one of the longest words in the English language and can ask for a beer in German. The laws of physics do not apply to me. I can make eggs and have a hot air popcorn popper. My favorite word is crepuscular, which refers to animals that are active at dusk. I use the Latin word for belly button because I am totally grossed out by those words. I am temporarily obsessed with yams.

In short, I am a total catch.
 
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