i miss my dad but when i go to see him make me feel guilty! please help!?

[wickedcooljade]

my parents divorced when i was three, and i'm now fourteen years old. my mum recently remarried and my dads engaged with another women. my mum doesn't like it when i go see my dad on weekends, because my dad makes remarks like "so hows school, is your lazy mother even driving you there now or do you catch a bus?" and they really upset me, and ofcourse my mum too. i feel guilty when i see him because of how mum feels, but i feel guilty when i don't go see him for months at a time. i really want to find a way to make my mum realize that i miss my dad, and she needs to let me go see him without her putting me on a guilt trip.

i haven't seen my dad in four months, and i really miss him a lot lately. please only give serious answers, and please don't tell me just to suck it up, because it really hurts me not seeing my dad.

thankyou,
10 points to the best one.

 

[xoxo]

well i think u should tell him straight up,(((daddy i llove coming to see u and love spending time with you ,but u sour up my day when u start making remarks about my mom, it really bothers me ,would u please stop it so i will have a nice time when i come to see u instead of hurting my feelings every time u have me around)))) be straigth to him and im sure he will stop doing it,if he knows how much it hurts u....good luck

 

[~t~kayla~t~]

Hon, what you need to do is talk to both of them. To your dad I would say:
"Dad, I miss you and I love you, but if you continue to put mom down while I'm visiting you I have no choice but to stop coming over. I would appreciate it if when I come to visit we just spend time together and leave mom out of it."
He needs to know it bothers you.
To your mom say:
"Mom I love you and you need to respect the fact that I love dad as well. I dont want you to make me feel guilty because he is my dad and I should have the right and choice to go see him. Just because I want to spend time with dad doesnt mean I love you any less".

 

[SherylF]

Ok your fourteen now and i think you need to talk to both of them , and tell them both to stop with the nasty comments , basically that is not on , and its not your fault and you should not be put on a guilt trip with both of them , they have both got other people in there lives now , isnt it time to get over it , when you are older , the u can make the desicion whether to see either of them .