Almost 4 year old cries/whines a lot, barely listens to us unless we...

tiffany

Member
...yell/threaten - advice? My son turns 4 in 3 months. I thought he'd be less "of a baby" by now, but he's not. He's very bright and intelligent, but if something's not reacting the way he wants or he doesn't get what he wants, he will cry and whine. I understand life won't go the way you want all the time, but he DOESN'T GET it. We have taken a strict reaction of ignoring him, closing the door, etc when he does this but it *keeps* continuing. I keep thinking "OK, this will be gone in 6 months" but the 6 months keep passing. I see similar aged girls (who I know are more mature than boys) outside and I don't hear 1 whine or cry! He's making me nervous and twitchy with all the over-emotions. What are ways to make this subside?

We've tried being gentle, firm, calm, ignoring, and mad. Nothing really works.

I threatened to take all his toys out of his room and put them in the closet and he'd have to 'earn them back' by not crying. It made him get serious. My husband can't take it either. Examples: Son was trying to use bike (still can't figure it out). We try to help and teach him, he says it's too hard and quits. We let him try by himself = too hard & quits, whines, cries. He talks to me constantly I can barely think - if I try to be quiet - he gets angry. He makes annoying noises all day - mouth noises - it drives you crazy.
Should he be this babyish? He starts preschool in Aug. -would have done sooner but wasn't potty trained - I think it will help learn OBEYING, but how to respect us??
Whines & cries:
-His blanket will fall off onto to the floor in the middle of the night. He won't get it, he'll cry for 30 minutes for us.
-He can't find a toy or sippy cup, he won't search more than 20 seconds, then has a fit. I tell him *calmy* let's go search the house, we find it, but he doesn't get he doesn't have to cry!!
-He almost refuses to listen to us. Husband has to practically scream at him to get him to cooperate.

We are really stressed. I don't think anything's really wrong with him - he's bright - but I am worried he's spoiled. We have lots of toys and grandparent toys, he has a lot. Even if I threaten to take stuff away, another level of the house has toys.

I just can't take anymore of him crying! It rattles my brain!! Ugh, you get the picture. Any advice?
Tiffany, not only do we have the same son, we have the same first name! No other child, he's our only one. I may email you!
I think boys are like this at this age. The doctor noticed he was crying a lot (well, haha, he's at the doctors he has a right to cry, every time he gets a shot!)

He very well knows what's expected of him. He's adamantly going against it. No movements with the sound, he does it to annoy us, and get a reaction - like quacking like a duck over and over, or a snake sound.

He loves reactions, like when he does something bad, or funny. His eyes light up for naughty stuff lately. He's even saying regular words in a naughty tone. I think it's just "sticking it to the parents" and enjoying it.
 

CassandraT

New member
put ALL but a few of his toys away.
If he has a tv in his room, take it out
Take him off the sippy cup and let him drink a regular cup lol hes old enough for it
make sure his grandparents do the same so he's not confused by his routine *if he has one* switching back and forth
feed him less sugar if you're letting him have lots of sugary treats
take him outside and play LOTS with him...make him too tired to fight/whine



call SuperNanny!!!!!!
 

venessa

New member
I also have a 4 year old that is the same to the "T". Please if you find out anything that works let me know!!! I am in need of much help. He is allot to deal with when I also have two other kids.Maybe it has something to there age? And maybe some parents know something we dont.But all kids are diffrent and diffrent personalities.But I know it still feels hopeless.
 

Pepperment

New member
Have you asked your doctor about any of this? Maybe there is a reason he isn't understanding what is expected of him. He may be having issues trying to explain how he is feeling or understand what you are trying to teach him. Also, is he doing repetitive movements with the strange sounds he makes? Try talking to a doctor or his teachers when he stars school and see if they are noticing any issues. He may be immature but, I would try and find out if there is an underlining reason first.
 
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