I was wondering: does Santa have a cell phone number?

Hate to break it to you sorry but he doesn't have one he isn't real. How do I know this on christmas eve once I went out to go 'secretly spy on santa' and I saw mum and dad filling my sack with presents. Along with about 3 years later my parents telling me he wasn't real
 
yep hes on my speed dial
but i cant give u his number, bcuz youve been naughty.
 
Yes, and I know it and I'm going to call him and tell him that you've been a very, very naughty boy this year. Unless you pay me not to, that is!
 
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